Jonathan Katz - Father

Richard Belzer & Jonathan Katz Season 1, Ep 0102 02/24/1992 Views: 693

Jonathan's father is going through a divorce suit. (2:44)

AND I MADEA CLASSIC FREUDIAN SLIP.

I MEANT TO SAY, "CAN YOUPASS ME THE SALT, PLEASE?"

BUT IT COMES OUT, "YOU PUTZ,YOU RUINED MY CHILDHOOD."

( laughter )

HE'S, UH...

( applause )

I SHOULD BE MORE GENTLE.

HE'S 81 YEARS OLD

GOING THROUGH A DIVORCE SUITAT THE AGE OF 81

AND MY STEPMOTHER'S TRYING

TO GET CUSTODY OF MEAND MY OLDER SISTER.

( laughter )

IT'S GOING TO GET UGLY,I KNOW IT--

WEEKENDS WITH HER,AND THE WHOLE SHOT.

BUT I MENTIONED TO YOU,I'M MARRIED TEN YEARS

AND WE HAVE A GOOD MARRIAGE,BUT YOU GO THROUGH STAGES.

MY WIFE IS WAY BEYOND

THE FAKING-THE-HEADACHE STAGEOF OUR MARRIAGE.

SHE'S NOW INTO THE "I FIND YOUPHYSICALLY REPUGNANT" STAGE.

( laughter )

LATELY I THINK THATSHE'S BEEN FOOLING AROUND

BECAUSE OUR PARROT KEEPS SAYING:

"GIVE IT TO ME HARD AND FAST

BEFORE MY HUSBAND, JON KATZ,COMES HOME."

( laughter )

"OH, YEAH.

AND YES, I'D LOVE A CRACKER."

( laughter )

BUT NONETHELESS, TONIGHT ISOUR TENTH WEDDING ANNIVERSARY

AND IT'S THE FIRST ONEWE'RE SPENDING APART

AND I PROMISED I'D DOA SONG FOR HER TONIGHT.

IF YOU'LL INDULGE ME,FOR MY WIFE.

TEN YEARS TONIGHT.

THEY FLY BY, THE YEARS,DON'T THEY?

I LOVE YOU, HONEY.

♪ YOU GAVE ME LOVE LAST NIGHT

♪ AND THEN I REALIZEDTHAT ALL MY LIFE ♪

♪ THAT I'VE BEEN HIDING OUT

♪ HIDING OUT FROM LOVE...

Oh, my God, who is thatexquisite-looking creature

sitting there?

♪ IN YOUR KISSWAS CONTAINED... ♪

She wants me bad.

♪ IT'S TRUE,SO SWEET I FELT ASHAMED ♪

♪ TO THINK THAT ALL MY LIFE...

Oh, great, now she'sundressing me with her eyes.

Hey, what's so funny?

♪ I'M IN LOVE WITH YOU, OO-OO

♪ THERE'S NO OTHER WAYTHAT I CAN EXPLAIN... ♪

Hey, she knows I'm married.

It's her problem.

♪ I WOULD DO ANYTHING

♪ TO HEAR YOU SAYYOU FEEL THE SAME. ♪

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.