DL Hughley - More Kids

DL Hughley: Shocked and Appalled Season 1, Ep 101 05/15/2005 Views: 5,279

DL Hughley doesn't trust his wife to take her birth control, so he takes matters into his own hands. (1:42)

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MOM, WHICH IS A VERY NOBLE

THING.

BUT NOW OUR CHILDREN ARE 17 AND

15 AND 13.

AND RATHER THAN BE HAPPY THAT

THEY LEAVING THE HOUSE, BECAUSE

SHE'S ALWAYS DEFINED HERSELF

AS A MOTHER, AND THAT IS A

NOBLE THING, BUT WHEN THE KIDS

MOVE ON IT'S TIME TO GET A NEW

DEFINITION.

BUT HER ANSWER IS "WE SHOULD

HAVE SOME MORE KIDS."

I'M LIKE "I JUST STARTED LIKING

THESE MOTHER [BLEEP]."

[LAUGHTER]

TO HELL I'M GONNA TAKE A CHANCE

ON A STRANGER FOR.

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

AND I ONLY LIKE MY KIDS 'CAUSE

THEY'RE MINE AND I KNOW BECAUSE

I GOT 'EM TESTED.

DAMN THAT.

COME ON DOWN TO THE DOCTOR MAKE

SURE YOUR MOMMY BEEN TELLING

THE TRUTH ALL THIS TIME.

"WHERE ARE WE GOING DADDY?"

"DON'T CALL ME THAT 'TIL THE

RESULTS COME BACK."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

"WHAT ARE WE GONNA CALL YOU?"

"CALL ME THE MAN [BLEEP] WITH

YOUR MAMA.

NOW GET IN THE CAR AND COME ON."

[LAUGHTER]

MY WIFE WANTS KIDS SO BAD THAT

I DO NOT TRUST HER TO TAKE HER

BIRTH CONTROL PILL.

MY WIFE WILL DO THAT.

"IT'S A MIRACLE.

PRAISE THE LORD."

[LAUGHTER]

NOW I'VE GOT TO TAKE MATTERS

IN MY OWN HAND.

I'M PULLING OUT, "WHERE ARE YOU

GOING?"

"SOMEBODY CALLED ME ON THE

PHONE."

"IF WE HAVE ANOTHER BABY

YOU'LL BE RINGING IT OUT OF

THIS SHEET.

DAMN THAT."

I DON'T CARE.

I DON'T CARE.

I DON'T CARE.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I DON'T.

"WHAT ARE WE GONNA CALL IT?"

"CALL IT COMFORTER, I DON'T

GIVE A DAMN WHAT YOU CALL IT."

[LAUGHTER]