IT IS ALSO OUR FINAL SHOW OF2015.
A SPECIAL OCCASION, AS I'M SUREYOU CAN TELL BY THE FACT THAT
I'M WEARING UNDERWEAR.
TONIGHT WE LOOK BACK ON SOME OFOUR FAVORITE STORIES TO HAVE THE
LAST 12 MONTHS IN OUR END OFYEAR REVIEW.
I WAS SUPPOSED TO UPDATE THAT.
THAT'S THE OLD -- CAN YOU GUYSCHANGE?
IT'S THE OLD -- THANK YOU.
ALL RIGHT, SO THIS WAS -- OKAY,YEAH --
(LAUGHTER)
ARE WE --
(LAUGHTER)
OH, YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT.
"STAR WARS" TICKETS, 26 MINUTES.
LET'S GET GOING, PEOPLE!
ANYWAY, 2015 WAS EVENTFUL FROMTHE "CHARLIE HEBDO" SHOOTINGS,
TO THE PLANNED PARENTHOODSHOOTINGS, TO THE SHOOTINGS IN
MALI, TO THE PARIS ANDSAN BERNARDINO SHOOTINGS.
2015 WAS A (BLEEP) YEAR.
BUT A LOT OF FUN STORIES TOREMEMBER.
REMEMBER WHEN A PIECE OF FABRICDIVIDED A NATION.
YEAH.
NO, NOT THAT ONE.
THE FUN ONE.
THE FUN ONE.
YEAH.
YEAH.
(APPLAUSE)
2015 WAS ALSO STRANGELY THEYEAR OF 2016.
IT'S THE PRESIDENTIAL RACE ANDTHE TWO SIDES COULDN'T BE MORE
DIFFERENT.
ON THE D. J. SIDE ALL CANDIDATESCOULD GET TO THE DEBATE ON ONE
MOTORCYCLE.
WHILE THE REPUBLICANS, I GUESSTECHNICALLY THEY COULD ALSO DO
THAT IF THEY WANTED --
(LAUGHTER)
I MEAN...
AND 2015 WAS ALSO A BIG YEAR FORGAY RIGHTS.
IN JUNE THE SUPREME COURTLEGALIZED SAME-SEX MARRIAGE IN
ALL 50 STATES!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
YES!
THAT'S RIGHT!
BUT, UNFORTUNATELY, SOME PEOPLEWERE UNHAPPY, LIKE THE KENTUCKY
COUNTY CLERK KIM DAVIS WHO WASARARRESTED FOR REFUSING TO ISSUE
MARRIAGE LICENSES AS THE LAWREQUIRED AND AFTER A WEEK IN
JAIL SHE HAD HER OWN COMING OUTPARTY.
>> A PERSON WHOSE COURAGEEXCEEDS THAT OF 99.9% OF THE
POLITICIANS OF THIS COUNTRY AND,SADLY, THAT EXCEEDS A BUNCH OF
EVEN THE PASTORS OF THISCOUNTRY, WOULD YOU PLEASE HELP
ME WELCOME TO THE STAGE KIMDAVIS!
(THEME FROM "ROCKY" PLAYING)
>> Trevor: THAT REALLY HAPPENED.
(LAUGHTER)
WE DIDN'T CHANGE ANYTHING ORADD THAT MUSIC.
MIKE HUCKABEE PLAYED "EYE OF THETIGER" FOR KIM DAVIS LIKE SHE
WAS ROCKY AND GAY MARRIAGE WASMR. T OR SOMETHING.
(LAUGHTER)
IT WAS SO INSANE.
IT WAS ALSO A BIG YEAR FORTHINGS VIRAL, AND FOR THAT WE
TURN TO JESSICA WILLIAMS,EVERYBODY!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
>> THANK YOU, TREVOR.
I HAVE BEEN ANALYZING ALL OF THESOCIAL-CYBER-VIRAL MEME DATA,
AND THIS YEAR'S WINNER BUT ACANADIAN MILE WAS DRAKE AND
VIDEO FOR "HOTLINE BLING."
IT WAS A HAUNTING PORTRAYAL OFMAN HAVING A SEIZURE INSIDE OF A
TANNING BED.
YES, VIRAL MEDIA WAS HUGE IN2015.
HOW HUGE?
"KYLIE'S LIPS" HUGE.
2015 WAS ALL ABOUT CHALLENGESINCLUDING THE "KYLIE JENNER LIP
CHALLENGE" WHERE KIDS SUCKED ONSHOT GLASSES TO GET THEIR LIPS
(BLEEP) UP.
THEY LOVE THE SEXY FISH LOOK.
THAT'S PRETTY MUCH MY WHOLE 2015-- OH, WAIT.
WE BID FAREWELL TO A VIRALHEAVYWEIGHT THAT DIED THIS YEAR.
EBOLA.
FINALLY ELIMINATED IN MOST PARTSOF AFRICA.
BUT THINGS ARE LOOKING UP TO YOUIN 2016, EBOLA.
WAIT, TREVOR, YOU AREN'T GOINGTO AFRICA THIS CHRISTMAS, ARE
YOU?
>> Trevor: WELL, NOT ALL OF IT.
(LAUGHTER)
>> OKAY, WELL, DON'T COMEBACK, OKAY?
>> Trevor: WHY ARE YOU SUCH ADICK, JESS?
>> SORRY, IT'S IN MY NATURE.
>> Trevor: YOU'RE SOBEAUTIFUL!
JESSICA WILLIAMS, EVERYBODY!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
ON A SLIGHTLY SADDER NOTE,THERE WAS ALSO THE YEARS OF THE
"BLACK LIVES MATTER" MOVEMENT,WITH TENSIONS BETWEEN THE
COMMUNITY AND THE POLICE--
>> TREVOR, STOP BEING SUCH ABUZZKILL, MAN!
DAMN!
>> Trevor: IT'S ROY WOODJUNIOR, EVERYBODY!
>> YEAH!
DUDE!
ENOUGH WITH THE "BLACK LIVESMATTER" STUFF, YOU'RE MAKING
EVERYONE DEPRESSED.
I'M HERE WITH GOOD NEWS FROM2015 TO CHEER EVERYONE UP.
>> TURING PHARMACEUTICAL C.E.O.MARTIN SHKRELI FOCUSED PUBLIC
OUTRAGE AFTER HIS COMPANY LIKEDTHE PRICE OF DARAPRIM FROM
$13.50 TO $750 A PILL.
>> IT'S USED TO TREAT WEAKENEDIMMUNE SYSTEM, TO PREGNANT WOMEN
AND PEOPLE WITH AIDS.
>> SOME DOUCHE BAG WAS CHARGING$750 FOR AN AIDS PILL.
>> Trevor: I THOUGHT YOU SAIDGOOD NEWS.
>> TREVOR, WAIT FOR IT!
>> MARTIN SHKRELI PURCHASING THESOLE COPY OF THE WU TANG CLAN'S
SECRET ALBUM.
>> MARTIN SHKRELI REPORTEDLYSPENT $2 MILLION FOR THE ONLY
COPY OF THE WU TANG CLAN ALBUM.
THE RECORD TOOK SIX YEARS TOMAKE, THEY ONLY MADE THE ONE AND
MARTIN SAYS HE'S NOT EVEN GOINGTO PLAY IT.
>> THEN HE BOUGHT THE ONLY WUTANG CLAN ALBUM AND HE SAYS HE'S
NOT EVEN GOING TO PLAY IT!
>> Trevor: THAT YOUNG DIRTYBASTARD!
>> BUT WAIT...
BREAKING NEWS THIS MORNING,THE DRUG COMPANY C.E.O. WHO
RAISED THE PRICE OF ALIFE-SAVING PILL BY MORE THAN
5,000% HAS BEEN ARRESTED.
FACES CHARGES OF SECURITIESFRAUD...
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
>> 'CAUSE THE WU TANG CLANAIN'T NOTHIN' TO (BLEEP) WITH!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
YOU'RE WELCOME, TREVOR!
AND BLACK LIVES MATTER!
>> Trevor: ROY WOOD JUNIOR,EVERYBODY!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
AH, 2015.
ONE OF MY FAVO FAVORITE STORIESWAS WHEN AMERICA FREAKED OUT
OVER A CLOCK BOY, A MUSLIMTEENAGE BOY IN TEXAS WHO CAME TO
SCHOOL WITH A CLOCK WHO SOMEPEOPLE THOUGHT COULD BE A BOMB.
>> HIS ENGINEERING TEACHER TOLDHIM TO KEEP IT OUT OF SIGHT.
>> BUT THE CLOCK SPOOKED THEENGLISH TEACHER WHO TOLD THE
PRINCIPAL WHO TOLD POLICE.
>> Trevor: YEAH, SNITCHED ONBY HIS ENGLISH TEACHER.
WHY ARE TEACHERS ALWAYS SUCHBITCHES?
(LAUGHTER)
YEAH, I SAID IT.
MR. SAMUELS.
I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN ABOUT YOU.
HOW YOU LIKE ME NOW?
(LAUGHTER)
YOU STILL THINK I'M NOT LIVINGUP TO MY FULL POTENTIAL, HUH?
WHAT'S THAT?
I CAN'T HEAR YOU!
BECAUSE I'M ON TELEVISION!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
THAT'S RIGHT!
I'M ON TV...
AND YOU DIED OF THROAT CANCER 12YEARS AGO.
(AUDIENCE REACTS)
I THINK ABOUT YOU EVERY DAY.
AND I CHERISH WHAT YOU TAUGHTME.
I MISS YOU.
(LAUGHTER)
JORDAN KLEPPER, WHAT HAVE YOUGOT FOR US?
>> HEY!
TREVOR!
HOW'S IT GOING, MAN?
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
THEY TELL ME THAT I GOT THEBAD BOY SEGMENT WHICH MAKES
SENSE BECAUSE EVERYBODY KNOWSI'M THE BAD BOY ON THE STAFF.
LET ME TELL YOU, THIS ISN'T THEFIRST BEER I'VE HAD THIS WEEK.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
NOW, WE ARE THE GANGSTAS OF 2015WHO DID WHAT WE WANTED WHEN WE
WANTED AND EVERYONE LOVED US FORUS, SO WHO AM I ADDING TO MY BAD
BOY CREW?
(BLEEP) NO, THE WRONG KIND OFBAD BOY.
I MEAN BAD BOY LIKE SMOKINGCIGARETTES AND LOITERING OUTSIDE
THE STORE.
I WANT A REAL BAD BOY THAT CANROLL IN MY CREW LIKE THIS GUY.
(BLEEP).
NO.
>> Trevor: THAT'S ROBERT DURSTWHO KILL ALL THOSE PEOPLE.
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU,MAN?
>>THAT'S NOT ME, YOU KNOW ME!>> Trevor: I DON'T KNOW IF I DO.
>> I DIDN'T MEAN BAD BOYS LIKE"BAD" BOYS, I MEAN COOL PEOPLE
LIKE ME, KIND OF DANGEROUS BUTCAN STILL APPEAL TO THE KIDS.
NO! NO! NO! NO!
THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!
THESE GUYS ARE NOT IN MY CREW!
WHO MAKES THESE (BLEEP)?
WHAT IS THIS?
NO!
SHUT IT DOWN!
SORRY!
TREVOR, I'M SORRY!
>> Trevor: JORDAN, WHAT THEHELL ARE YOU DOING?
DIDN'T YOU REHEARSE?
>> I SKIPPED REHEARSAL BECAUSEI'M A BAD BOY!
>> Trevor: OKAY.
THANK YOU, JORDAN KLEPPER,EVERYBODY.
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
I GUESS 2015 WAS ALSO THE YEARWE SAID GOODBYE TO JORDAN
KLEPPER.
>> OH, GOD!
OH!
>> Trevor: GO AWAY, JORDAN!
AND NOW HERE'S DESI LYDIC ANDHASAN MINHAJ!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
>> THANK YOU, TREVOR!
WELL, THIS WAS THE YEAR THE U.S.
GOVERNMENT FINALLY SAID IT WOULDPUT A WOMAN ON THE $10 BILL, AND
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT WOMENWHO DESERVE THIS HONOR.
HERE ARE TWO WHO DEFINITELYDON'T.
FIRST THE HUNGARIAN CAMERA WOMANWHO TRIPPED SYRIAN REFUGEES
INCLUDING ONE CARRYING HISCHILD.
WOW, LOOKS LIKE TRUMP FINALLYFOUND HIS RUNNINGMATE.
>> YEAH, BUT LET'S NOT OVERLOOKANOTHER STRONG CONTENDER FOR NOT
BEING ON THE $10 BILL, RACHELDOLEZHAL.
>> VERY TRUE, BUT SHE WOULDPROBABLY MAKE IT ON TO A
COUNTERFEIT $10 BILL.
SHE WAS OF THE ROSA PARKS PEOPLEWHO SHOULDN'T BE ASSOCIATED WITH
ROSA PARKS.
>> WE ALL PRETENDED TO BE BLACKTO GET INTO COLLEGE BUT THIS IS
RIDICULOUS.
>> DID WHAT?
TREVOR...
>> Trevor: THANK YOU.
DESI LYDIC AND HASAN MINHAJ,EVERYBODY!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)
AND TO WRAP UP THE ANIMALS, WEARE JOINED BY BY RONNY CHIENG!
>> THANKS, TREVOR.
HERE ARE THIS YEAR'S TOP ANIMALSTORIES.
FIRST UP, PIZZA RAT.
>> WHO DOESN'T LOVE PIZZA!
COME ON, THIS IS ONE DETERMINEDRAT CAUGHT ON CAMERA.
THIS WAS SHOT IN THE FIRSTAVENUE L TRAIN STATION.
>> THE PIZZA RAT THAT BECAMEFAMOUS FOR DRAGGING A PIECE OF
PIZZA DOWN SUBWAY STAIRS.
YOU KNOW HOW MANY HITS THISSTUPID VIDEO GOT?
8 MILLION HITS!
IT'S A RAT DRAGGING A SLICE OFPIZZA DOWN, LIKE, TWO STEPS!
(LAUGHTER)
HE'S NOT EVEN GOING UPTHE STAIRS!
HE'S GOING DOWN THE STAIRS!
YO...
GRAVITY IS DOIFG MOST THE WORK!
I'M SUPPOSED TO BE IMPRESSED?
THAT SHOULD CALLED GRAVITY PIZZAFEATURING A RAT.
PIZZA RAT DOESN'T EVEN EAT THEPIZZA!
HE JUST DRAGS IT AND RUNS AWAY!
8 MILLION HITS!
PEOPLE TREATING HIM LIKE HE'SSOME KIND OF HERO?
HE'S JUST A QUITTER!
(LAUGHTER)
THAT IS WHAT'S WRONG WITHAMERICA TODAY, GIVING TROPHIES
TO RATS.
NOT EVEN SPECIAL RATS.
ANYONE CAN DO THAT.
LOOK AT ME!
I'M TRACKING A SLICE OF PIZZAAROUND.
JUST DRAGGING IT AROUND, NOTEATING IT.
QUICK, SOMEONE GIVE ME A MOVIEDEAL!
>> Trevor: ALL RIGHT, WELL,THAT WAS WEIRD, RONNY CHIENG,
EVERYBODY!
THANKS, RONNY AND THE WHOLE "THEDAILY SHOW" NEWS TEAM.
THAT WRAPS UP OUR 2015REVIEW!