Deon Cole - Making Drugs Work

Season 11 , Ep 14 03/09/07 Views: 15,456

Drug dealers need to play it safe because they have a responsibility to their customers. (3:02)

ALRIGHT. HEY.

I'M HAPPY TO BE HERE.

THIS IS GROUNDBREAKINGRIGHT HERE, MAN.

I APPRECIATE THIS, MAN.THANKS FOR COMING OUT.

I'M GONNA DO SOME JOKES.

AND AH, YOU KNOW,HOPEFULLY THEY WORK.

AND IF THEY DON'T, YOU KNOW,I DON'T LIVE HERE

SO IT DON'T MATTEROR NOTHIN' LIKE THAT SO.

I'M JUST GONNATRY SOME JOKES OUT REAL QUICK

SEE IF THEY WORK OR WHATEVER.

- LET'S SEE.- [LAUGHTER]

OKAY. LET'S START THIS OFF WITHSOMETHING THEY MIGHT LIKE.

[LAUGHTER]

OKAY, COOL.

I LIKE DRINKIN'VODKA AND CRANBERRY.THAT'S MY DRINK.

THAT WAY YOU'REABLE TO GET MESSED UP ANDCLEAN YOUR SYSTEM OUT

- AT THE SAME TIME.- [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I LIKE TO STAY EVENWHEN I GET MESSED UP. YOU KNOW?

LIKE I JUST FOUND OUTFISH IS BRAIN FOOD.

IT ENHANCE YOUR BRAIN CELLS.AND THAT'S GOOD TO KNOW.

'CAUSE LIKE WEEDKILLS YOUR BRAIN CELLS.

SO IF I EAT SOME FISHAFTER EVERY JOINT,

I SHOULD BE EVEN AGAIN, RIGHT?

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

YEP. I MIGHTJUST START SMOKIN' FISH.

YOU KNOW, JUST CUTTHE MIDDLEMAN OUT. YOU KNOW?

I REMEMBER ONE TIMEI TRIED TO GET HIGH ANDI DIDN'T HAVE NO WEED.

AND MY LITTLEHISPANIC HOMEY WAS LIKE,

"DEON, HOLMES,IF YOU DON'T HAVE NO WEED,

"TAKE SOME CIGARETTES,DIP 'EM IN SOME COLD MEDICINE.

DRY 'EM AND SMOKE 'EM.YOU'LL BE MESSED UP."

I'M LIKE, "FORGET YOU, PEPE.I AIN'T ABOUT TO DO THAT."

ABOUT A WEEK LATERI'M OVER MY COUSIN'S HOUSEPLAYIN' PLAYSTATION.

I'M LIKE"YOU GOT SOME COLD MEDICINE?"

HE WAS LIKE"YOU GOT SOME CIGARETTES?"

I'M LIKE, "YEAH." WE DIPPEDAND DRIED AND SMOKED 'EM.

FIVE MINUTES LATERI WAS LIKE-- HA, HA, HA, HA.

OH, HIGH AS HELL.BUT WE WASN'T HIGH.WE WAS JUST SLEEPY.

I AIN'T HAD A CHEST COLDSINCE THAT HAPPENED.

IF THERE'S ANYDRUG DEALERS IN THE HOUSEI JUST WANNA TELL YOU

FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART,KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK.

DON'T GET CAUGHT. PEOPLE LIKE MENEED YOU OUT HERE. ALL RIGHT?

THE GUY I WAS BUYIN'WEED FROM IN CHICAGO, HE DIED.AND IT HURT MY SOUL, TOO.

I JUST WANNA TELL THE DEALERS,YOU CAN'T BE OUT ON THE STREETS

ACTING ANY KINDOF WAY YOU WANT TO,

GETTIN' SHOT ANDSTABBED AND STUFF.

I MEAN YOU GOTRESPONSIBILITIES, YOU KNOW?

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

I MEAN, YOU GOTTA THINK ABOUTYOUR CUSTOMERS, YOU KNOW?

I MEAN IF YOU DIE,HOW WE GONNA GET HIGH?YOU SEE HOW THAT WORKS?

ONE OF THOSE GUYS GETS THE WEEDAND SETS TO ANSWER THE DOOR

I'M LIKE, "HEY, REED,TELL SNAKE I WANNA GETA LITTLE 20 SACK."

SHE LIKE "DEON, SNAKE DEAD."I'M LIKE, "WHAT?

"SO THERE AIN'T NO WEED HERE?

HOW'D HE GO DOWN ANDTAKE THE WEED WITH HIM, HUH?"

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