Andrew Kennedy - Junk Mail

  • Season 11 , Ep 3
  • 01/18/2007
  • Views: 16,706

After 20 years of junk mail, Andrew's dad finally snapped. (1:31)

LAST TIME WE WERE IN FLORIDA, HE PUT HIMSELF IN HIS OWN

WITNESS PROTECTION PROGRAM.

WE'VE BEEN LIVING IN THIS COUNTRY FOR 20 YEARS.

THAT'S 20 YEARS OF JUNK MAIL.

AND ONE DAYHE JUST FINALLY SNAPPED.

AND HE WALKED DOWN THE STAIRS WITH AN ELECTRIC CHAINSAW

AND OUT THE FRONT DOOR."IT ENDS TODAY!" WHAT?

WHAT'S DAD DOING WITH A CHAIN SAY?

[SPANISH ACCENT] "I DON'T CARE AS LONG AS HE'S NOT DOING IT

- IN THE HOUSE." - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

SO WE HEAR THE CHAINSAW GO ON,

AND THEN HE WALKS IN WITH THE MAILBOX STILL ATTACHED

TO HALF THE POST. "WE'VE GOT A P.O. BOX NOW.

"WE'RE INCOGNITO, NOT MORE JUNK MAIL

"COMING TO 20 COTTONWOOD COURT, 'CAUSE I'VE GOT THE MAILBOX.

IT'S TECHNICALLY IMPOSSIBLE."

- [LAUGHTER] - HE'S RIDICULOUS.

AND SO IF ANYTHING GETS THROUGH THE FIREWALL HE SET UP, RIGHT,

HE'LL HAND WRITE LETTERS, 'CAUSE HE'S UPSETANYTHING GETS THROUGH.

HOW CAN JUNK MAIL, [BRITISH ACCENT] "DEAR KMART,

"YES HOW-- HOW-- HOW COULD I PUT THIS DELICATELY,

"I ASKED YOU REPEATEDLY TO REMOVE ME FROM YOUR COUPON LIST

- EFFECTIVE IMMEDIATELY. - [LAUGHTER]

[BLEEP] OFF. YOU KNOWHE WAS A LOSS FOR WORDS.

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS, WHISTLES AND APPLAUSE]

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