Extended - Daniel Tosh - Mexico and Canada - Uncensored

Daniel Tosh: People Pleaser Season 1, Ep 1 04/17/2016 Views: 4,829

Daniel Tosh wonders why everyone is suddenly obsessed with guacamole and explains what enables Canada to be such a peaceful country. (1:40)

Mexicans?

You know who you are.

You are notsupposed to be here.

I love Mexicans.

I love Mexican food,

but next timeI'm in your restaurant,

please don'tcome up to my table and ask

if I would like to startwith the house-made guacamole.

You know good goddamn wellI want that guacamole.

Let's just bring it out.

I make that kind of money now.

What's upsetting to meis when my entrée comes

with a free side of guacamolestaring me in the face,

teaching me a costly lessonin patience.

That's too much guacamole.

What kind of Ponzi schemeare you Mexicans up to?

This joke is stupid.I don't care.

What happenedin the last ten years

in this countrywhere we've become so obsessed

with guacamole?

"Is there gonna beguacamole there?"

"Honey, get dressed.It's avocado season."

This joke doesn't workin Canada

because they've never heardof Mexicans.

Canada has the greatest fenceever built...

America.

It is foolproofif you can afford it.

Really easy to be the cool,open-minded, hippie country

when there'sa Kevlar Snuggie of America

draped around your fat,frozen asses,

daring the worldto talk shit.

"We don't useour military."

Uh, we know.We got you taken care of.

Go back to bed.

We'll wake youwhen the NHL play-offs start.