Nikki Glaser - Period Tracker App

Marriage Material Season 2, Ep 7 10/17/2014 Views: 13,032

Nikki Glaser explains why she is completely obsessed with her smartphone and how it keeps her from getting pregnant. (1:02)

I DON'T KNOWIF ANYONE HAS THAT.

DO YOU REALLY?- YEAH.

- IT'S THE MOSTAMAZING THING EVER.

IT'S SO STUPID.IT IS A CALENDAR-LIKE THING--

LIKE A "VAGENDA."

AND WHAT YOU DO IS--YEAH.

YOU PUT YOUR PERIODIN YOUR PHONE ONCE, RIGHT?

LIKE, YOU JUST, LIKE, BLEEDON IT, LIKE, A LITTLE BIT,

AND YOU JUST--

THESE SMART PHONES,THEY'RE SO INTUITIVE, YOU GUYS.

WHERE DOES IT END NOW?

DON'T BLEED ON YOUR PHONE.

YOU JUST MANUALLY, LIKE,RUB BLOOD ON IT.

AND THEN--J.K., DON'T DO THAT EITHER.

YOU JUST PUT IT IN, AND THEN IT,LIKE, TRACKS IT FOR YOU.

IT'LL TELL YOU, LIKE, WHENYOU'RE GONNA GET YOUR PERIOD.

IT TELLS YOU LIKE,♪ TWO DAYS YOU'RE GONNA ♪

♪ BE A BITCH

IT HAS LIKE A LITTLE DEVIL FACE,LIKE "STAY INSIDE, WHORE."

WHOA!

I THOUGHT THIS WAS, LIKE,PRO-WOMAN.

TELLS YOU WHEN YOU'RE MOSTFERTILE.

SO YOU KNOW NOT TO [bleep]ON THOSE DAYS.

THAT'S IMPORTANT.

IT'S NOT LIKE, "GET PREGNANT."I MEAN, YOU'RE USING AN APP

TO DETERMINE WHEN YOU'REBLEEDING,

SO MAYBE A BABY ISN'TTHE BEST THING FOR YOU.

I DON'T KNOW,I JUST CAN'T HAVE KIDS.