I had to get a special visato come and do gigs here.
And the actual wording
on the visa I have says,"David O'Doherty
is an alienwith extraordinary ability."
And that is big talkright there,
especially when you've alwayshad a mild complex about looking
I'm from Ireland,and it's similar
to Boston;it is similar in that...
I'd say the main differencewould just be day-to-day life
in Ireland,it's just a bit more mystical.
You know, more smoke machinesand synthesized.
It's more like livingin an Enya song.
To give you a little bitof history, I guess,
if you don't know about Ireland,going right back,
Ireland's indigenous peoplewere the leprechauns.
Or the lepricians,
as no one calls them,
and they died out tragically,
owing to the factthat they were all male,
and that they never existedin the first place.
Nothing will killa race off quicker
than never actuallyhaving existed.
And then the nextmajor character
in Irish history is St. Patrick.
And St. Patrickis the patron saint
of strangers peeingin your front garden.
That is how heis still commemorated
around the worldfor one day every year.
God, he used to be hugewhere I come from.
Like, bigger than MySpace or R. Kelly.
Not so much anymore;I think, to be honest,
whatever people used to getfrom the Lord,
I just get the same thing nowfrom the Internet
because they're similar
in that they're, like,invisible, but all around us.
And they knowfreaking everything.
That's the advantagethe Internet has over the Lord
is that you can ask the Internetquite specific questions.
Like, we were always toldas children, ask God anything.
God is always listening,so, I'd be like,
"God, why do bad people
always seem to do so wellin the world?"
And God would be like,
"Well, David, here is
a very ambiguous book."
But with the Internet,you can be much more specific.
You know, be like,
"Did OMC have any other hits
apart from 'How Bizarre'?"
"No, he did not."
"Thank you, Internet;Lord, look and learn."
Can't illegally download Deadwood off of you, either.