Joe Mande - New York City Bodegas

  • Season 4 , Ep 8
  • 09/13/2013
  • Views: 15,561

A drunk Joe Mande has a few questions for the owner of his neighborhood bodega. (2:43)

New York,it's great to be here.

It's lovely to standin front of a neon swastika.

That's pretty cool.

Very comforting.

Uh, it is greatto be back.

I used to live in New Yorkfor years.

And, uh, I had to moveto L.A. last year.

And I-- I miss New Yorkvery much.

Uh, I was thinkingabout it recently

and I realizedthe thing I miss most

about livingin New York City

are the bodegas.

A lot of people don't knowwhat bodegas are.

Oh, well, they're onevery corner in New York City.

Uh, they're a lot likea convenience store,

like a 24-hour 7/11,

but, uh, much smallerand filthy.

Filthy.

And all they sellare, like, plantains...

Jesus candles.You know?

You know,the essentials.

But they are convenient.They're open all night.

One time I went intomy neighborhood bodega

It was, like,3:00 in the morning.

I was very drunk or high,it doesn't matter.

All you need to knowis if my mom saw me,

she would be very sadand disappointed in me.

It's 3:00 in the morning.Very drunk and high.

Walked over, grabbed a bagof Goya-brand potato chips,

or whatever they sell there.

And I start walkingtowards the cash register.

I made, like, three steps,

and then out of nowhere,uh, I suddenly heard

the worst noiseI'd ever heard in my life.

It was just this awfulhigh-pitch screeching sound.

I thought it was, like,an alarm or something.

And I startedlooking around

to see if I could turnthe alarm off.

And eventuallyI glanced down,

and that's when I noticed

I was standingon a cat.

Right?

So I lift my leg up,the cat ran away,

and I was like,"I'm sorry, bodega cat."

Then, uh, you know,I started looking around

to see if anyone heard the noiseover the reggae tone blasting

on the radio.

Then I look at the counter,

and the store owneris glaring at me.

He saw the whole thing,and he was furious.

As he should be.

I was standing on his catfor so long.

Like...

I was like, Señor, question.Ooh, pregunta.

Una. Una pregunta.

Um, por qué gato...

man?

Why the [BLEEP] do you havea gato running around...

your trabajo?

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