Uncensored - Dane Cook - Browser Histories

Troublemaker Season 1, Ep 101 01/25/2015 Views: 13,090

Dane Cook points out that nobody in the world should have a completely clear browser history. (1:21)

What can we do right atthe beginning of therelationship

to [bleep] crackeverything open?

Get to the good stuff?

Well, you've gotto look for shit.

You've got to-- right now,it is legal to snoop and look

for shit.

OK?

That's not weird anymore.

I think that thatshould be the rule.

Even if it's a first date.

If somebody leaves the room, andtheir computer is open and on,

get on there.

Just start-- doesn't matter.

If they walk into the room,you're on my computer?

Yeah!

I want to know who the[bleep] you really are.

I don't have time to waste.

Life is short.

Who the-- are you a sociopath?

I want to know what's going on.

[laughter]

Anybody who thinks they'rebeing smart here, by the way,

I'm going to pointsomething out.

Nobody's browserhistory should be clear.

[laughter]

If you go on somebody's computerand their browser history

is clear, get the[bleep] out now.

Nobody should have timeto be clearing browsers.

You go on a girl browser,it should be like Pinterest,

Pinterest, Pinterest, Pinterest,Pinterst, WebMD, Pinterest,

Pinterest, Pinterest, Pinterest.

[laughter]

Guy browser?

Clear.

[laughter]

We're such sneaky shit bums.

Every time we leave the house wego, oh babe, I forgot my keys.

We didn't forget the keys, weforgot to clear the browser.

That's how paranoid we are.

[laughter]