Gabriel Iglesias - Roller Coasters

  • Season 7, Ep 1
  • 02/06/2003
  • Views: 205,189

The one argument big friends have: Who is the biggest? (4:56)

OH, MAN,I GOTTA TELL YOU THOUGH.

IT'S COOL BEING A BIG GUY.

YOU KNOW WHY, 'CAUSE I HAVENOTHING BUT BIG FRIENDS,

WHICH IS SO COOL 'CAUSE WHEN YOUHAVE NOTHING BUT BIG FRIENDS,

YOU NEVER GET INTO ARGUMENTS,EXCEPT ONE.

AND THAT IS "WHO IS THEBIGGEST?"

AND I'M GONNA LET YOU GUYS KNOWRIGHT NOW, THERE'S ONLY ONE WAY

TO SETTLE THIS.

WE ALL GET IN A BUS AND WE GO TODISNEY.

AND WE GET IN A ROLLER COASTER.

AND WHOEVER GETS THE LEASTAMOUNTS OF CLICKS ON THE SAFETY

BAR...

(LAUGHTER)IS THE BIG ONE.

AND I DON'T CARE WHAT THEME PARKYOU GO TO IN AMERICA, IT'S

ALWAYS THE SAME GIRL WHO WORKSON EVERY SINGLE ROLLER COASTER.

YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT,RIGHT?

(SQUEAKY VOICE) "OH, MY GOD.

(GIGGLES)HI, LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,

WELCOME TO THE MAGICAL WORLDOF DISNEY.

MY NAME'S LIBERTY.

I'M SO HAPPY TO BE HERE.

OH, MY GOD.

(GIGGLING)SHUT UP."

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)THEN SHE BREAKS DOWN THE RULES

AND REGULATIONS, TURNS AROUNDAND SEES US, RIGHT?

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN,PLEASE FOR--

OH, MY GOD."

(GIGGLES)THE GUY IN THE CONTROL BOOTH,

HE'S LIKE, "DAMN."

(GIGGLES) "I KNOW, HUH?""LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THERE'S

BEEN A SLIGHT CHANGE OF RULES.

UM, PLEASE FORWARD ONE ATA TIME."

SO, MY FRIEND MANDO GOES FIRST,RIGHT?

"GABRIEL, DON'T WORRY, BRO,I'LL GO FIRST."

(SOUND OF DOOR OPENING)(SOUND OF DOOR CLOSING)

(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)(SOUND OF FLOOR CREAKING)

(SOUND OF DOOR CLOSING)ALRIGHT, HERE WE GO.

(SOUND OF SEAT BELT CLICKING)TWO CLICK.

(LAUGHTER)OH, HE THINKS HE'S BAD

WITH THOSE TWO CLICKS.

"STAND BACK, KIDS, WATCH THIS."

"GO, SHREK."

"SHUT UP."

(LAUGHTER)(SOUND OF FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

(SOUND OF FLOOR CREAKING)(HEAVING BREATHING)

ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.

(SOUND OF SEAT BELT CLICKING)(CLICKING STOPS)

(SOUND OF HEAVY BREATHING)(TAKES DEAP BREATH)

(CLICKING CONTINUES)(CLICKING STOPS)

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)(SQUEAKY VOICE) "THREE CLICKS."

"SHUT UP."

(GIGGLING) "OH, MY GOD.

AH, THEY FIT.

(LAUGHTER)BYE."

(COASTER STARTS)(COASTER DESCENDS)

(COASTER CLIMBING SLOWLY)(COASTER DIES)

(SOUND OF BREAKS HISSING)(LAUGHTER)

(BLEEP)(COASTER DESCENDS)

AHHH!

(COASTER CLIMBS SLOWLY)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

(COASTER MOVING BACKWARD)(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)

(SOUND OF BREAKS HISSING)(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)

(LAUGHTER)

ONE HOUR LATER.

"LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, THIS ISPHIL STEVENS REPORTING LIVE

FOR ACTION NEWS.

WE'RE STANDING HERE LIVEIN FRONT OF THE MAGICAL WORLD

OF DISNEY, WHERE AUTHORITIESBELIEVE TWO LARGE LATINOS

DID NOT MAKE THE LOOP."

(LAUGHTER)AND RIGHT NEXT TO HIM WILL BE

THE GUY FROM THE OTHER STATION,RIGHT?

(SPEAKING SPANISH RAPIDLY)...DOS LATINO'S-- DAMN."

MUCH LOVE, NEW YORK.

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