John Oliver - Sticker Shock

John Oliver: Terrifying Times Season 1, Ep 101 04/20/2008 Views: 89,438

Upon reflection, John Oliver thinks putting a warning sticker on science textbooks isn't such a bad idea. (2:05)

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IT'S GONNA GET ANY BETTER,

LET ME BURST THAT BUBBLEOF OPTIMISM NOW,

BECAUSE I WASFORTUNATE ENOUGHLAST YEAR

TO BE INVITEDTO THE FIRST

REPUBLICAN PRESIDENTIALCANDIDATE DEBATE

IN SIMI VALLEYIN CALIFORNIA,

WHICH INTERESTINGLY WAS

EXACTLY AS MUCH FUN

AS IT SOUNDS.

BUT IT WAS, OBVIOUSLY,A PRIVILEGE TO BE THERE.

AND I DID GETTO WITNESS

ONE INCREDIBLE MOMENTOF POLITICAL THEATER

WHEN ALL--AT THAT POINT 10--

POTENTIAL LEADERSOF THE FREE WORLD

WERE ASKEDTHE SAME QUESTION.AND THAT QUESTION WAS

"WHO HEREDOESN'T BELIEVE

IN EVOLUTION?"

AND THREEOF THOSE MEN

RAISED THEIR HANDS.

AND THEN NONE OF THOSETHREE MEN

PUT THEIR HANDS DOWNAND SAID,

"ONLY JOKING."

AND THEIR CONFIDENCEWAS SEDUCTIVE.

AND I STARTEDLOOKING INTO THESEGROUPS IN AMERICA--

CAMPAIGN GROUPSWHO WANT US TOPUT STICKERS

ON THE FRONT OF ALLSCHOOL SCIENCE TEXTBOOKS

EXPLAINING THAT EVOLUTIONIS ONLY ONE

POSSIBLE THEORYOF LIFE ON EARTH.

NOW ALTHOUGHTHIS SEEMS

LIKE A STUPID IDEA

AT FIRST, SECOND

AND 39th GLANCE,

LOOK AT ITONCE MORE.

GIVE ITTHAT 40th VIEW

BECAUSE IT'S BRILLIANT.

LET'S HAVE STICKERSON THE FRONT OF ALL BOOKS.

SLAP ONE ON THE FRONTOF THE BIBLE SAYING,

"OF COURSE, THIS COULDALL BE BULL--.

MAYBE HE NEVER DIED.

PERHAPS HE OPENEDA DONKEY SANCTUARY.

HE HAD A CLEAR BONDWITH DONKEYS."

OR SLAP ONEON THE FRONT OFTHE THEORY OF GRAVITY--

"LOOK, IT'S JUSTONE MAN'S OPINION.MAYBE WE CAN ALL FLY.

R. KELLYBELIEVED IT SO.

WHY WOULD HELIE TO US?

WHAT DOES HE POSSIBLYSTAND TO GAIN?"

( applause and cheering )