Todd Glass - SeaWorld Story - Uncensored

The One with the TV Host Perks Season 1, Ep 5 08/28/2014 Views: 5,927

If SeaWorld didn't exist, Todd Glass thinks that people would have a much harder time explaining the kind of accidents that happen there. (1:58)

There's another thing they do.Are you tired?

And it's this thing you pluginto the wall that keeps bugsout of the house.

But then the voiceoverperson comes on.

Are you tired of exterminatorscoming into your house...

spraying poison on yourchildren and food?

I get you want to movemerchandise, so it behooves youto lie about exterminators...

because you want peopleto buy your thing.

But can you just make up stuff?Are people that, you know,driven to buy stuff?

Even if there's no fa--

Are you tired of exterminatorscoming into your house...

putting on your wife's clothesand taking a shit in your yard?

People are like, "I amactually-- if they do that, thenI am tired of that."

First of all, exterminatorsnever spray poison...

into anybody's babyor anybody's face.

They never come in, "Is thatyour baby?" "Yes, it is."

Hey, you just sprayed poisonin my baby's face.

"Yeah, I'm an exterminator."

By the way, every so often,this happens...

and we're not talking aboutwhether this is sad or not.

It's always sad if somebodyloses their life.

We'll hear a situation inSea World, where, you know,the killer whale kills somebody.

And again, it's sad,it's always sad.

The thing is,why are they shocked?

If Sea World didn't exist,and you told someone thatstory... just on it's own.

It seems like you're fuckingcrazy. If you went upto someone...

You're not gonna believe whathappened. Don't even guess.

Don't even try to guess it.This is crazy.

You're never gonna seethis coming.

And we're smart,and we didn't see it coming.

And we're not dumb, and we'renot dumb, seriously.

We're not dumb, and we didn'tsee this coming.

So you're not going to.

But we took a killer whale outof the ocean with a crane,right?

And then we put itin a baby pool.

And we had a guy swim around it.

Well, it was sort of scared,and tried to teach it tricksand shit.

And you're not gonnabelieve what it did.

The guy's like, "It killed him?"

You're like, "Shut the fuck up!Who told you?"

You would have never guessedthat on your own.

Good night,thank you very much.

That was did great!

Thank you, that was fun.

Oh... yeah.

God, that was so much fun.

To do, like a show, in front ofthose crowds, it's fucking nuts.