Cristela Alonzo - What Happened?

Schimmel, McCullough, Guillory, Mellard, Alonzo, Belleville, Segura Season 2, Ep 0204 07/05/2007 Views: 9,481

No one said a thing about Cristela Alonzo's 40-pound weight gain until she went to get her eyebrows waxed. (1:59)

in Vietnam.

Where all my workersspeak nothing but English.

It's payback time!

I gained 40 poundsin two years,

and no one said a thing.

No one.

Until the day I went to getmy eyebrows waxed by Linda,

who I hadn't seenin over a year.

She's the one that told meI was overweight.

Like she needed to tell me!

The moment I walked in,she was, like,

"Oh, no!


"What happened?!

Oh, you used to be little.Now you are huge!"

Th-Thank you.

Can you wax my eyebrows?

Actually, my goal in lifeis to look like a stripper.

I've decided that strippersare, like,

the hottest-looking womenin the world.

And I meet a lot of strippers,

and they always saythe same thing.

"I'm paying my waythrough medical school."

Now, if that's the truth,why is it

that you never meet a doctorthat used to be a stripper?

You think they'd be everywhere.

I'd advertise it.

Guys would want to go in forcheckups all the time, you know?

It's, like, "Hey, big boy.

Does it hurtwhen I go like this?"

How about this?

Does it hurtwhen I go like this?

Yeah! Yeah!

Daddy's got a big deductible!

Yeah! Yeah!

Stick it in the thong! Ha-ha!

Hundred dollars!

Dr. Peaches says you're healthy!

Like, wow.

My husband's sick again.

It's weird.