Maria Bamford - Nemesis

  • Season 11 , Ep 10
  • 02/15/2007
  • Views: 10,925

Going back to your hometown can be kind of annoying. (1:31)

AND THEN YOU GO BACK TO YOUR HOMETOWN OF DULUTH, MINNESOTA

- AND YOU MEET YOUR-- - [LOUD CHEERING]

- ALL RIGHT. - [LAUGHTER]

AND YOU GO BACK TO YOURHOMETOWN AND YOU MEET UPWITH YOUR ARCHENEMY,

CHRISTIE COMBS FROM HIGH SCHOOL AT TARGET

AND YOU REALIZE NOTHING'S CHANGED AT ALL.

AND YOU'RE STILL THE GREAT BIG HOSE BEAST YOU ALWAYS WERE.

[LAUGHTER]

"SO I SAW YOU ON TV OR WHATEVER.

"IT WAS JUST LIKE IN HIGH SCHOOL.

IT'S, LIKE, YOU'RE NOT FUNNY. YOU'RE JUST WEIRD."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

"COMED-- COMEDY'S SUB-- SUBJECTIVE.

IT'S AN ART-- ART FORM."

"SO, ARE YOU GAY? 'CAUSE I HEARD A LOT OF

WOMEN COMEDIENNES ARE GAY." "NO, I'M NOT GAY.

"I MEAN, IT'D BE OKAY IF I WAS BUT I'M NOT."

"WELL, THAT'S GOOD. 'CAUSE REMEMBER WHEN WE ALL WENT TO CHRISTIAN BIBLE CAMP,

"WE ALL WENT SKINNY DIPPIN' THAT ONE NIGHT.

"YOU WOULDN'T TAKE YOUR SHIRT OFF.

"AND I'M LIKE, 'OH MY GOD,YOU GOT NOTHING TO SHOW ANYWAY.'

"AND THEN YOU TOOK IT OFF AND WE ALL GAVE YOU TITTY TWISTERS?

"I WAS, LIKE, OH MY GOD, IF YOU'RE A [BLEEP,]

"WE'D HAVE BEEN ALL TURNED ON BY THAT.

"AND THEN I JUST GOT ALL GROSSED OUT.

"[SOUND OF HEAVY BREATHING]

PRESS DEBIT OR CREDIT"?

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

BOO-YAH!

Loading...