Gabriel Iglesias - Saudi Arabian Falconry

Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy Season 1, Ep 101 04/07/2013 Views: 18,512

If Gabriel Iglesias owned a trained falcon, he would never leave the house. (1:14)

AND HE'S GOT A FALCON WITH HIM,

AND HE'S GOT A GLOVE, AND HE

HANDS ME THE GLOVE, AND I PUT

IT ON, AND HE TRANSFERS HIS

FALCON TO MY ARM.

AND ALL OF A SUDDEN, HE STARTS

DOING SNAPPING THINGS, AND HE'S

BASICALLY SHOWING ME THAT THE

FALCON'S TRAINED, AND I THOUGHT

THAT WAS GREAT.

I THOUGHT WE WERE GONNA KILL

SOMETHING.

I'M LIKE, "NO!"

BUT WE WERE JUST PLAYING

WITH THE FALCON, AND I STARTED

GETTING EXCITED, YOU KNOW?

AND THE MORE EXCITED I GOT, THE

MORE THE PRINCE STARTED SHOWING

HIS AGE, 'CAUSE THEN HE GOT

EXCITED.

I'M LIKE, "THIS IS GREAT."

"IT IS GREAT."

"YEAH, THIS IS SO COOL."

"SO COOL."

I'M LIKE, "GOD, YOU'RE SO LUCKY

TO HAVE SO MANY FALCONS."

"I AM SO LUCKY.

WOULD YOU LIKE A FALCON?"

SO MATTER-OF-FACT.

LIKE, "WOULD YOU LIKE A COOKIE?

WOULD YOU LIKE A FALCON?"

SAME WAY!

I'M LIKE, "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?

DON'T GIVE ME A FALCON THAT CAN

RETRIEVE THINGS.

SHOOT, YOU THINK I'M LAZY NOW."

HELL, NO.

DON'T GIVE ME A--NO, UH-UH.

I WOULDN'T EVEN LEAVE THE HOUSE.

I'D BE AT THE FRONT DOOR.

"DOUGHNUTS."

[imitates falcon screeching]

AND WHO THE HELL IS GONNA WATCH

MY FALCON WHEN I'M UP HERE

PERFORMING?

I CAN'T LEAVE IT WITH MY BUDDY

MARTIN IN THE BACK.

YOU KNOW HE WOULD ABUSE IT, TAKE

IT TO SOME NIGHTCLUB, TRY TO

HOOK UP WITH IT.

FREAKING...

[imitates bassy club music]

"THE REDHEAD."

[imitates falcon screeching]