RETURN JULY 2014
Back then, nobody believedhe would win.
I remember comediansdissing him.
They'd come out and be like,"How many y'all seen
"that mixed-race foolrunning for president?
"Y'all seen thatcrazy-ass mixed fool?
"How some mixed foolgonna come in--
"Even a black man can't win,
"this mixed foolthink he gonna win.
"He gonna win (bleep).
"Ain't no mixed fool--I ain't seen no mixed fool
"come out herewinning the United States--
that mixed fool,that mixed fool."
And then he wonand then all of a sudden,
they were like, "My (bleep)!"
So, I see.
And I wanted black.
So, I bought myselfa plane ticket, yeah.
18 hours of flying-- that's whatI had to sit through.
18 hours of non-stop flying.
I didn't sleep a wink.
I sat on that planeand I watched every single
black American movieand TV show I could find,
just so I could practicebeing black.
I was not going to mess upthat black-ortunity.
I just sat therelike a madman in my chair,
just like watching movies,practicing,
"Yeah, yeah, you know I mean?You know I mean?
Oh, you laugh, but I landed,I landed in Miami,
and I was fluentin my black American.
For shizzle, my nizzle,I was just...
I was so black.
I was even laughing black.
I was like, "Ha, ha, ha!
Yeah! My man!"
I was super black.
Till some guy came up to meand was like, "Oh, yeah, papi!"
18 hours of flying,and I still wasn't black.
I was Puerto Rican.