The Boys Are Back in Town - Let's Rename Fire Ants

Tuesday, July 5, 2016 07/05/2016 Views: 282

Inspired by an online petition to rename fire ants, Emily Fleming, John Ross Bowie and Jay Mandyam list alternative names for other members of the animal kingdom. (2:19)

An online petition gainedworldwide support this weekend,

and as of this momentit's only around 8,000 shy

of its target goal of 25,000.

I want you to take note.

Rush to your computersas soon as this show is done.

Once the benchmark is hitthe petition will be delivered

to president Barack Obama andFacebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg.

So what is the willof the people that needs

to be addressed in America'smost powerful corridors?

It is...

let's rename fire antsspicy boys!

Yes! It's time, you guys.

It's time.Let's call it what it is.

These fire ants are spicy boys,

and it's timewe acknowledged this legally.

Uh...(laughing)

I can't stop...

I am so (bleep) on board this,you have no idea.

Even if just for, like,if someone gets attacked,

you're like, "What happenedto your foot? Oh, spicy boys.

Yeah, spicy boys."

The highest office in the landmight be forced to address

an issue that is near and dearto the hearts

of every picnicking American

and a handful of pervertswho try to stick their dicks

in hollow trees.

I am... cannot tell youhow much I support this.

Uh, so, uh, comedians,

in honor of the fire ant-spicy boys initiative,

I would like you to renameas many other animals as you can

in 60 seconds. And begin. Emily.

Mosquitoes are now calledZika fairies.

All right, points.(laughs)

That's so (bleep)-up.

Uh, John Ross Bowie.

Iguanas will now be renamedthe preferred pet

of the douchebagwho wears a black cowboy hat.

All right, points. Jay.

Black bearsare now forest Kardashians.

All right, points. Emily.

Fire ants are now called spicywhatever you identify with.

All right, points. Jay.

Ostriches are now calledKa-Kareem Abdul-Jabbirds.

All right, points. Jay again.

Pit bulls are nowbald, washed-up Cuban deejays.

All right, points.

Emily.

(cheering and applause)

Uh, dolphins are a little rapey,

so, uh, we're gonna call 'emsea Cosbys.

(buzzer sounds)

He should go to jail.He did it on porpoise.

Aw. Come on, you guys.

Aw, come on.