Jon Reep - Fixing the Pool

  • Season 10 , Ep 11
  • 03/23/2006
  • Views: 77,664

Jon's dad fixed a hole at the bottom of a deep pool. (3:31)

LIKE HE ALWAYS HAD THIS MASTER PLAN FOR A PROBLEM THAT NEVER WORKED EVER.

WE HAD A POOL GROWING UP.

IT WAS A NICE POOL. HAD A DEEP END.

HAD A SHALLOW END. HAD A LINING IN IT.

AND ONE DAY THE LINING GOT RIPPED AT THE VERY BOTTOM.

AND HE HAD TO FIX IT.NOW, HE COULD'VE EASILY

DRAINED OUT ALL THE WATER FIRST.

BUT THAT WOULDA BEEN SIMPLE, SAFE, AND EFFICIENT. AIN'T GOT TIME FOR THAT.

SO, HE FIGURES HE'LL JUST GET A BACKPACK, ALL RIGHT?

FILL IF FULL OF ROCKS TO HOLD HIM DOWN AT THE BOTTOM.

YEAH. YEAH. YOU KNOW, SO HE CAN FIX IT WITHOUT FLOATIN' UP.

AND THEN HE'S GONNA USE A GARDEN HOSE TO BREATH THROUGH,

ME AND MY BROTHER AREJUST 'SPOSED TO HOLD ITAT THE TOP FOR HIM.

I WISH YOU GUYSCOULDA SEEN IT.

HE WAS HANGIN' ON THE SIDE OF THAT POOL,

HE'S GOT A SACK OF ROCKS ON HIS BACK,

THERE'S DUCK TAPE EVERYWHERE,HOSE AND HE GOT NERVOUS

RIGHT BEFORE HE WENT UNDER WATER.

AND HE GAVE THIS LITTLE SPEECH.

HE'S LIKE "LISTEN TO ME. SHUT UP. THIS IS IMPORTANT.

"LISTEN. IF YOU TWO BOYSFEEL YOUR DADDY HERE

"TUGGIN' ON THIS HOSE, THAT MEANS ABORT MISSION.

AND I WANT YOU TO PULL ME BACK UP WITH THE HOSE."

SO, YOU GOTTA IMAGINE, TWO TEN YEAR OLDS,

JUST STANDING THERE WITH THIS HOSE,

YOU KNOW, IN CHARGEOF THEIR FATHER'S LIFE.

AND WE'RE JUST THINKING, "DADDY SURE IS SMART. WOW."

HE'S DOWN THERE MAYBE TEN SECONDS.

AND OF COURSE, THE WATER PRESSURE STARTS TO COLLAPSE THE HOSE.

RIGHT? YEAH. SO, HE STARTS TUGGIN' ON IT.

AND ME AND MY BROTHER PANIC. WE JUST WE JUST YANK IT

OUTTA HIS MOUTH AND OUTTA THE POOL.

AND YOU CANNOT GET A HOSE TO GO BACK UNDER WATER. IT SNAKES UP ON YOU.

SO, HE'S DOWN THEREFREAKIN' OUT, YOU KNOW,

'CAUSE HE CAN'T GET THE BACKPACK OFF.

AND ME AND MY BROTHER UP TOP, "HEY LOOK, DADDY'S WAVIN'."

FINALLY, HE DECIDES THE ONLY WAY OUT OF THIS PROBLEM

IS HE HAS JUST GOTTA RUNAS FAST AS HE CAN

TO THE SHALLOW END OF THE POOL UP THE SLOPE.

I DON'T KNOW IFYOU'VE EVER SEEN ANYBODY

JUST GET IT UNDER WATER WITH A SACK OF ROCKS ON THEIR BACK.

HE LOOKED LIKE AN ASTRONAUT ON A STAIRMASTER.

HE FINALLY MADE IT UP SOMEHOW

ALL THE WAY UP TO THE SHALLOW END.

HE'S JUST LIKE, "BEH, BEH, BLEGAW,

"AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, COME HERE.

"AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, BOTH OF YA.

"AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, OH MY GOD.

"AHUH, AHUH, AHUH, WHAT THE HELL.

"DIDN'T YOU TWO IGIOTS--

DIDN'T YOU SEE YOUR DADDY DOWN THERE WAVING FOR HELP?"

WE JUST LIKE, "WELL, WE JUST THOUGHT YOU WAS WAVING DADDY.

WHAT'S AN IGIOT?"

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