Brian Regan - Animal Sounds

Brian Regan: Standing Up Season 1, Ep 101 06/09/2007 Views: 22,951

Brian Regan has a bone to pick with the children's book author who decided that dogs say, "Bow wow." (1:30)

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Does the owl go, "who,"

or does it go, "hoot"?

Half the books say one.Half the books say the other.

Let me tell you something.Owls don't go, "hoot." Okay?

Has anyone ever heardan owl go, "Hoo-t"?

Hoot!

Never in the historyof the animal kingdom...

has an owl enunciatedlike that. Ever.

Toss those booksin the trash can.They didn't do their research.

Who's decidinghow they go, you know?

"The horse goes, 'Neigh.'"

When? When?

When does a horse do that?

"You wanna give me a ride?""Neigh."

Everybody knowshorses don't go, "neigh."They go, "Wilbur."

Common knowledge, I believe.

They're all over the placewith dogs.

"The dog says, 'Bark.'"

"The dog says, 'Ruff.'"

"The dog says, 'Woof.'"

"The dog says, 'Bow-wow.'"

That's the onethat intrigues me.

Who the hell ever heard a dog...

and could have possiblyinterpreted it that way?

[ Imitates Dog Barking ]"Did you just heara bow-wow?"

"I distinctly hearda bow-wow."

[ Imitates Dog Barking ]"There it is again. Bow-wow.

You're not hearing that?You're not hearing a bow-wow?"

[ Barks ]Bow. Wow.

"You're not hearingany of that?"