Richard Lewis - Bloody Mary

Mike Macdonald & William Coronel Season 1, Ep 25 02/24/1992 Views: 598

Richard's friend drank a Bloody Mary at 7 a.m. (2:06)

WELL, ACTUALLY, IT'SA BROTHER AND SISTER ACT

AND THEY COME TO EVERY GIG,LIKE, WEEKS BEFORE

AND THEY CALL ME AT MY HOTELAND THEY GO

"THERE'S GOING TO BE TROUBLEIN ROW 29, SEAT B AND C."

THAT'S BECAUSE I'M...I GET WORRIED, YOU KNOW.

BUT I CAN SEE UP THERE,AND YOU'RE FINE.

BECAUSE YOU'RE NUNS--

THAT'S WHY EVERYTHING'SGOING TO FABULOUS.

AND I LOVE NUNS--I DIDN'T MEAN THAT

IN A DISRESPECTFUL WAY,YOU KNOW THAT.

BUT, UH...BUT I'M A LITTLE ANXIOUS

BECAUSE I HAVE A BEST FRIEND...WELL, A COLLEGE FRIEND

AND HE'S GETTING MARRIED FORTHE SIXTH TIME, WHICH IS SAD.

SO HE COMES OUT HERE AND HE SAYS

"I CAN'T BELIEVEYOU'RE HOSTING THE A LIST."

I SAID, "I WROTE YOU A LETTER."

I WROTE IT LIKE EIGHT WEEKS AGO.

I MEAN, WHAT IS... THE MAILKEEPS GOING UP, THE STAMPS.

I MEAN, FIRST-CLASS MAIL SUCKS.

WHAT IS...WHAT IS THIRD-CLASS MAIL?

THEY MUST STRAP A LETTER ONTHE BACK OF A MENTAL PATIENT

AND HE WANDERS AIMLESSLY.

( laughter )

BUT HE'S MOVING OUT HERE WITHHIS SOON-TO-BE-SEVENTH WIFE

OR SIXTH, I DON'TEVEN KNOW ANYMORE

AND HE HAS ONE KID FROMHIS, I THINK, SECOND MARRIAGE

AND HE TURNED HOLLYWOOD--

HE CALLED HIS SON "BRUNCH,"WHICH I FELT WAS SAD.

( laughter )

AND I PICKED HIM UP, ANDHE WAS NERVOUS, HE WAS DRINKING.

LIKE, HE TOOK THE RED-EYEFROM NEW YORK, AND, UH...

I MEAN, 7:00 A.M.-- LOOK,I'M NOT JUDGING ANYBODY

BUT HE HAD A BLOODY MARYAT THE AIRPORT BAR

AND... I DON'T KNOW,IT WAS ALMOST LIKE

IF YOU'RE GOING TO DRINK AT 7:00

WHEN THEY PUTTHAT CELERY STALK IN THERE

IT WAS ALMOST LIKEAN ANNOUNCEMENT

LIKE WAR OF THE WORLDS:

"SOMEONE IS DRINKING AT 7:00,SOMEONE IS DRINKING AT 7:00."

( mimicking alarm )

REALLY, AND IT JUST...

BUT, UM, YOU KNOW,I DIDN'T MIND HIM DRINKING.

I MEAN, I'M NOT...I DON'T JUDGE ANYBODY

BUT HE STARTED EVERY SENTENCEWITH, "HO, HO, HO!"

SO I DON'T KNOW,THAT WAS EMBARRASSING.