It is a weird time,though, too.
We don't pay attention.Nobody can have a conversation,
man, 'cause of phones.We are addicted to our phones.
It's like having a crack pipein your pocket all the time
that you don't stop thinking of.
It's ama...I'm addicted to my phone.
I never put it down.I hold it all day.
I'll be going 90 milesan hour on the highway.
I will put everyone's lifeat risk...
so I can clean outmy spam e-mail.
These penis pill e-mailshave to go.
I cannot live comfortablythe rest of my day
knowing that they're in there.
I'll be honest.
I haven't seen a lightturn green in four years.
Right? You heara honk from behind,
you're like, "Ah, I guessit's green, time to go."
You ever lose your phone?
That pit you feelin your stomach,
like someone just stoleyour first-born child.
You start like,you all of a sudden
you turn into a pimplooking for his ho
with his moneyjust flipping furniture like,
"Where is this bitch?"
When you find it,
you just stroke itthe rest of the day.
"Don't ever leave me againor I will kill you."
You ever try to listento somebody
while they're talkingto you in person
while your phone's in your hand,
and your phone starts vibrating?
And they're talking and youjust start tweaking out
trying to listen.
Man, somebody better die
in your story real quick.
Or I'm about to tweet somethingright in your face.
You ever notice when you goto lunch or dinner now,
the first thing people dois take out their phone
and put it on the tablein front of you
like it's a revolverin the Old Wild West.
That's the threat to you.
You got ten secondsto say something interesting.
I'm gonna shoot youin the face, partner.
As your story slows down,
they just start reaching for it.