Looking for an interestingFacebook profile picture,
but you don't want to travelall the way to Italy
just to get a selfiewith some old statue's old dick?
Well, just go online tocommission an original portrait.
You just upload a photo,and redditors
will draw a picture of youor your dog
or the person you're stalking.
So, comedians, I'm gonna showyou an Internet source portrait
and user-submitted picture,and for 250 points,
I want you to tell me howthe subject asked to be drawn.
Uh, and please do itin the classic Titanic
Draw Me Like One of YourFrench Girls style, please.
-I'm begging you. All right.-Who said it,
-the girl or the guy?-It was the girl. Kate Winslet.
What's her name.What's her name. Sorry.
-HARDWICK: Yeah. Uh...-Kind of a popular movie, Matt.
-I mean, a lot of people...-I don't know who said it.
-Give it a watch sometime.-You know, acting like
you never saw Titanic a bunch of times
-doesn't make you any cooleror... -(laughter)
-manlier or... -I love that...I loved that movie!
-I know you did. Yeah, yeah.-I love that movie!
I'm still so (bleep) mad thatold lady threw the (bleep) thing
into the oceanat the end, though.
-(laughter)-That didn't have to happen!
Like, that wasa piece of history!
It could have gonein a museum or...
I (bleep)...Aw, man!
I wish Indiana Joneswould've just, like,
caught her on the wristwith a whip
-and just, like, yanked it up.-Ooh!
-Is that gonna be the nextIndiana Jones movie? -I wish.
(laughing):That's all it's gonna be.
He visits the Titanic.
-(as Rose): Good-bye, Jack!-(imitates whip cracking)
(as Indiana Jones):It belongs in a museum!
-(laughter)-That would've been amazing!
Would've have been(bleep) amazing.
-(whooping, applause)-And then...
she's like, "It's beautiful!"
Wah-wah-wah-wah-wah...And just melts.
That's what I want to see.Get on it, Hollywood.
First up, this fuzzy-faced dude.
(laughs):This fuzzy-faced dude.
What request did he make?
Draw me likeone of your were-pineapples
Draw me like a Sasquatchwho makes his own craft beer.
Next, an open-mouthed girlin wonder.
what did she promptthe artist for there?
Draw me like one of yourfailed human rodent experiments.
-(laughter)-All right. Points.
Uh, draw me likeI'm about to give you
a really painful blowjob.
-All right, points.-(laughter)
Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, there'sa lot of teeth in that one.
-(groaning)-There is a lot of gnawing...
Uh, Paul F. Tompkins.
Can I deviatefrom the form a little bit?
-Is that okay?-Please. Yeah.
Look... I'm notgonna get nude for you.
But work my vaginain there someplace.
Oh, wow, a whistle!
Like... like Georgia O'Keeffethis thing.
Next up, this disappointed dude.
I know. What'd he ask for?What'd he ask for?
Just... (bleep) my (bleep)all the way up.
Your (bleep) has beensuitably (bleep).