Jim Gaffigan - Everyone Loves Doughnuts

Jim Gaffigan: Obsessed Season 1, Ep 1 04/27/2014 Views: 87,333

Jim Gaffigan believes that not liking doughnuts is simply wrong. (1:42)

The police,they love donuts, right?

Hey, cop.Why don't you get a donut?

Cops love donuts.

Which isan interesting stereotype,

because you knowwho else loves donuts?

Absolutely everyone.

Of coursecops love donuts,

'cause they know the differencebetween right and wrong.

And not liking donutsis wrong!

Have you ever met someonethat doesn't like a donut?

You want to know why?Because they're in jail.

[chuckling] I had a donutbefore I came onstage.

I was with a friendlast week.

I was like,"You want to get a donut?"

He was like, "I'm not hungry."

I'm like, "What does thathave to do with it?"

As if there's ever beena good reason to eat a donut.

Well, doctor says I needmore powdered sugar in my diet.

Donuts are bad for you,

and accordingto my health-nut wife,

they're "not appropriatefor a trail mix," you know.

I'm juston a different trail, right?

Mine leadsto the emergency room.

That joke will be even funnierwhen I die from cardiac arrest.

"That's why I didn't laugh."

Donuts areall about taste.

In Los Angeles, there's a placecalled Yum Yum Donuts.

It's like, what?

Do you need the IQ of 1to find that appealing?

Yum Yum?

Me like yum yum.

It's like, who'sthe target audience, cavemen?

I know two thing.

Yellow fireball rise in skyand Yum Yum Donuts.

Yum Yum Donuts, yum yum.