Twitter, B.C. - What Tragedy Has Befallen Poor Reba?

Tuesday, January 31, 2017 01/31/2017 Views: 88

Hampton Yount, Adam Newman and Phoebe Robinson go back to Twitter's early days to decipher cryptic tweets from celebrities. (3:14)

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These days we know Twitteris a social network

where anonymous strangerscan call you a "cuck,"

but back when it was brand-new

users didn't really knowwhat the hell to do with it.

So there were lots of tweets,like this one from 2009

from Martha Stewart.


Uh, from the looks of this,she sent this out

immediately after smashingthe said tree with her car.

So, comedians, I--she's fine, she's fine.

-Was that sent from prison?-It was sent from prison, yeah.

Uh, comedians,I'm gonna show you a tweet,

literally from the last decade,and for 250 points,

please answera follow-up question.

First up, this 2009 Oprah tweetwhere she seems to think Twitter

is some sort of office intercom.



What's a... what's another orderOprah might tweet for Jimmy?

-Phoebe. -Hey, Jimmy,I just want to let you know,

I love bread...!

-Yeah, points. Points.-(cheering, applause)

-Adam. -I thoughtof this really great idea

-for a tweet, Chris.-What was it, Adam?

You get a Reuben!You get a turkey sandwich!

-You get a turkey club!-(cheering)


Adam, good work.

Next up, how about thisearly period tweet

from country music legendReba McEntire?

HARDWICK (reading):

And then it just ends.

Just trails off.

Sent from my iPad.


Comedi-- I know.Reba, poor Reba.

What tragedy has befallenpoor Reba?

What tortureis she talking about?


You have to try the breakfastat Guantanamo Bay.


-Literal points there.-Yeah.

They pour the juiceright on your face.

HARDWICK:Right in there.


-HARDWICK: Next up.-(whoops)

Here's a tweet from veteranjournalist Barbara Walter's

first day on Twitter in 2009,and it says:

HARDWICK (reading):

(audience exclaiming)

That's amazing.

Comedians, give some adviceto this Twitter newcomer.


Great, wake me up when you'reready for Twitter anal.

HARDWICK:All right, points.

(cheers and applause)

Get that back row.

Otherwise known as Snapchat.



Put a towel down so you don'ttweet on the sheets.

HARDWICK:Points. Very good, very good.

-That's just good planning.-ROBINSON: Take it from me.

-NEWMAN: Been there.-Yeah.

-Not... you know.-HARDWICK: Hampton.

ROBINSON:Yeah. You've seen it.

No, Barbara , this is stilljust masturbating.

HARDWICK:All right, points.

Points. It is.


I, too, was on Twitterback in the Stone Age.

Here's my tweet from 2008.

HARDWICK (reading):

I didn't say what.

Comedians, what was Italking about?


You were talking aboutCloris's punk band

called Clitoris Leachman.