Kevin Heffernan - Marrying a Doctor

Kevin Heffernan & Steve Lemme - Below the Belt Season 1, Ep 1 11/11/2016 Views: 521

Kevin Heffernan's wife is a doctor, and he's willing to put up with almost anything to keep her around. (1:05)

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She's-- well, I marriedabove my pay grade.

No, I hit the jackpot.

My wife is a doctor.

[applause]

Pretty good.

Pretty good.

Farva married adoctor, pretty good.

[laughter]

There was some love involved.

There was some love involved,but she's a [bleep] doctor,

come on, man.

No, the threshold forbreaking up with a doctor

is much higherthan other people.

Like the shit you normally breakup over, you don't do it when

you're dating a doctor, right?

Like she chews with hermouth open, who cares?

She snores, who cares?

She's got a dick,who gives a shit?

[laughter]

She's a [bleep]doctor man, come on.

Here's the other thing.

Growing up, I always hatedgoing to the doctor's-- hated,

hated going there.

I figured, marry adoctor, you don't have

to go to the doctor's anymore.

Brilliant, right?

Here's where I [bleep] up.

My wife's a gynecologist,and I don't have a vagina.

If you've seen "Super Troopers,"you know that I have a dick.

Kind of-- I kind of have a dick.

It was cold that day.

It was cold that day.

But I'll tell youthis, a gynecologist