Howard Kremer - I Heal with My Steal

  • Season 11 , Ep 20
  • 04/05/2007
  • Views: 6,547

Dragon Boy Suede saves lives with his steal. (2:48)

THE CURATIVE POWERS OF MY WANG.

IT'S CALLED,"I HEAL WITH MY STEEL!"

LET'S DO IT. [MUSIC PLAYS]OH, SCRATCHATORY!

GIVE IT UP FOR "SCRATCHATORY RAPE!"

GIVE IT UP FOR HIM! THEY GOT IT RIGHT THIS TIME!

LET IT GO! ALL RIGHT!

LADIES, DRAGON BOY SUEDE WILL MAKE YOU FEEL BETTER,

PHYSICALLY, SPIRITUALLY AND EMOTIONALLY.

LET'S LISTEN TO CASE STUDY ONE. HERE WE GO.

I MET A HOMELESS CHICK HER NAME WAS DAISY

SHE STUMBLED AROUNDACTING ALL CRAZY

TALKING TO HERSELF MUTTERING OBSCENITIES

HER CRIB WAS A CARDBOARD BOXWITH NO AMENITIES

SHE LOOKED LIKESHE JUST CRAWLEDOUT THE SEWER

I WALKED OVERINTRODUCED MYSELF TO HER

SAID I GOES BY THE NAME OF DRAGON BOY SUEDE

IT'S A PLEASURE TO MAKEYOUR ACQUAINTANCE TO-DAY

WENT BACK TO HERCARDBOARD BOX

STRIPPED DOWN TO OUR SHOES AND SOCKS

LAID HER DOWN KISSED HER GENTLY

THEN I THREW HERTHE BANG OF THE CENTURY

ALL OF A SUDDENSHE FELT GREAT

SHE GOT HER MIND BACKSHE COULD THINK STRAIGHT

TODAY SHE'S THE PRESIDENT OF HER OWN COMPANY

SHE CREDITS THIS TO THE NIGHT SHE WAS HUMPING ME

I HEAL WITH MY STEEL

- [APPLAUSE] - ALL RIGHT.

COME ON, NEW YORK. I HEAL WITH MY STEEL.

WHEW!

I HEAL WITH MY STEEL

ALL RIGHT. JUST THE LADIES. JUST THE LADIES.

I HEAL WITH MY STEEL

OKAY, A COUPLE OF LADIES GOT SOME STEEL.

I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT HAPPENED.

ALL RIGHT, VERSE NUMBER TWO. IN THIS VERSE,

DRAGON BOY SUEDE GETS PRESENTED WITH A MORAL QUANDARY.

CHECK IT OUT.

I HEARD ABOUT A CHICK SHE WAS ABOUT TO DIE

I RACED TO THE HOSPITAL ROOMTO SAVE HER LIFE

BUT SHE HAD NOT YET REACHED THE LEGAL AGE

OF CONSENT SHE WAS STILL JAILBAIT

THE ONLY THING THAT COULD SAVE HER FROM HER FATE

WAS CONSIDERED BY THE STATETO BE SCRATCHATORY RAPE

WHAT A WASTE SUCH A SHAME

SHE PASSED AWAYBEFORE THE MORNING CAME

I JUST SAT THERE SO DEPRESSED, SO FRUSTRATED, SO STRESSED

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN,MY MIND SNAPPED

I JUMPED ON THE BED,'CAUSE I HAD TO BRING HER BACK

RESURRECTION VIA ERECTION REANIMATED, REJUVENATED

THE GIFT OF LIFE IS WHAT SHE WAS GIVEN

WELCOME BACK TO THE LAND OF THE LIVIN'

I HEAL WITH MY STEEL, YEAH!

I HEAL WITH MY STEEL

LIKE A 24-HOUR EMERGENCY CLINIC, I HEAL WITH MY STEEL

NO INSURANCE NECESSARYI HEAL WITH MY STEEL

GIVE IT UP FOR SCRATCHATORY RAPE.

[CHEERS, WHISTLES & APPLAUSE]

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