John Ridley - Abortion Rights

Jeff Stilson & John Ridley Season 1, Ep 0134 02/24/1992 Views: 752

If men could get pregnant, abortions would be legal. (2:21)

ACROSS THE COUNTRY NOW.

IT'S REALLY UNFAIR THAT MEN

GET TO HAVETHE BIG SAY IN ABORTION.

AFTER ALL, MEN,WE DON'T GET PREGNANT, DO WE?

( cheering )

I THINK THAT MAKESA BIG DIFFERENCE

IN HOW YOU FEEL ABOUT ABORTIONIF YOU GET PREGNANT.

I'M NOT SAYING WHETHERABORTION IS RIGHT OR WRONG.

I'M SAYING I'M A MAN,I KNOW MEN.

IF MEN COULD GET PREGNANT

NOT ONLY WOULDABORTIONS BE LEGAL

I THINK McDONALD'SWOULD BE DOING THEM.

( applause )

ABORTION IS IN FRONTOF THE SUPREME COURT.

WE HAVE A NEW JUSTICE,CLARENCE THOMAS.

HE MAY BE A GOOD JUSTICE.

MY BIG PROBLEM WITH HIM

IS THAT WHEN CLARENCEWAS UP FOR CONFIRMATION

THE ADMINISTRATIONWAS GOING AROUND SAYING

THAT HE REFLECTED THE VIEWS

OF AFRICAN AMERICANSACROSS THE COUNTRY

WHICH, GEE, I DON'T THINK SO.

HE'S REPUBLICAN,HE'S CONSERVATIVE

HE'S EPISCOPALIAN.

HE'S MARRIED TO A WHITE WOMAN.

WHY DON'T WE JUST NOMINATEAL JOLSON TO THE COURT?

( laughter and applause )

I'M SORRY, VANILLA ICEIS BLACKER THAN THIS GUY.

( laughter )

( cheering, whistling )

IN MY BOOK

CLARENCE MAKES BRYANT GUMBELLOOK LIKE A MUSLIM.

FORGET ABOUT IT.

( laughter )

SO NOW THAT I'M LIVINGIN LOS ANGELES

I'M ASKED A LOT

"DO YOU WANT TO BE IN MOVIES?

DO YOU WANT TO BEA POSITIVE BLACK ROLE MODEL?"

I SAY I DON'TWANT TO BE IN MOVIES.

THE BLACK GUYALWAYS DIES IN THE MOVIES.

I'D BE THE COP WHO GETS KILLEDIN THE FIRST TWO MINUTES

SO MY PARTNER CAN SPENDTHE NEXT TWO HOURS AVENGING ME.

"I'M GOING TO AVENGE YOU, MAN."

"HEY, WHY DON'T YOUJUST COVER ME

WHEN THEY'RE SHOOTING AT US?"

THE BLACK GUY DOESN'TALWAYS DIE IN THE MOVIES.

I SAW THE HAND THAT ROCKS THE CRADLE

WHICH IS A VERY GOOD MOVIE.

ERNIE HUDSON, A BLACK GUY--

HE'S IN THAT MOVIEAND THEY DIDN'T KILL HIM.

I THOUGHT THAT WAS VERY NICE.

OH, SURE, THEY MADE HIMRETARDED, BUT...

( laughter )

JUST A COINCIDENCE.

YOU PUT A BLACK GUY IN A MOVIE

WITH TWO BEAUTIFUL WHITE WOMENYOU GOT TO DO SOMETHING.

THEY MADE HIM A RETARDED, BLIND,GAY EUNUCH WITH NO HANDS

BUT THEY DIDN'T... KILL HIM.

( laughter )

ACTUALLY, WE HAVE A LOTOF POSITIVE BLACK ROLE MODELS