Gabriel Iglesias - Legalize It & Bear Community

Dillon Garcia & Wil Sylvince Season 2, Ep 3 10/18/2012 Views: 32,818

Martin Moreno would like Florida to legalize weed, and Gabriel Iglesias discovers some new fans. (3:01)


We've been here in townfor a couple weeks now, man.

We, it got crazylast night, huh, Martin?

Aw, bro, it got out of control.

How's-How'syour recovery?

Bro, it's going good.

Let me tell you something:Me and Uli...

he's a party animal, bro.

Uli's crazy.Ozo knowshow to party.

MARTIN:Bro, we ended up

in some chick's housein Hialeah smoking weed.

We're gonna use his hornas a bowl, bro.

We're gonna use...

Weed is not legal in Florida,

but you guys haveto legalize it.

Seriously, you really do.

I'm-a tell you...

Because if you legalize it,

you guys will stop eating faces.

Trust me, you willstop eating faces

if you legalize weed.

(Iglesias laughing)

Just saying, homey.

Hey, a little bath saltnever hurt nobody, man.

We got a chance to hita couple comedy clubs

to kind of warm up for the shows

and we did a show over in,uh, in Northern California,

at this comedy clubcalled The Punch Line.

Afterwards, we walk outside

and we go around the side of thebuilding and we started walking

down this flight of stairsand as we're walking down,

these two big guys turn thecorner and started walking up.

And I mean big.I'm a big guy, but damn!


And I say that and I was like,

"Martin, back up, back up,back up, back up, back up."

And Martin'sdrunk and brave.

"Bro, you look weak backing up."

I go, "Shut up, I look alive."

And the guys get to the top ofthe stairs and I'm thinking,

"Oh, they're goingto keep going."

But they don't,they get right in our face.

And as soon as the guygot right here,

in my mind I was alreadycancelling credit cards,

you know, I'm tryingto figure out

where there's an Apple Store.

I'm bracing myselffor what's about to happen.

And I close my eyes reallytight and then I open them

and this guy looksat me and he's like,

(lisping):"Oh, my God, it's Fluffy!"

Oh, he kept going.

"Look at you, you areso fluffy, you are so fluffy.

"Touch him, touch him,touch him.

"You're like a standingTempur-Pedic, yes, you are."

"This is my friend Charles,he's a huge fan.

"Tell him, Charles, tell him."

And then his buddy stepsup and he's like,

(deep, gruff voice):"Listen...

"I've been watching you

"for a long timeand I got to tell ya,

you are a really big hitin the bear community."

And I said, "Did youjust say I'm a big hit

in the bear community?"

And the other guy was like,"Yes, please don't be offended.

"He doesn't meanYogi or Boo Boo.

"A bear is actually a gay manwho is not, I repeat,

"not a little princess.

"He's not smalland tender and tiny.

"He's actually a big man,a burly man,

"a hairy man-- delicious, yes.

"Oh, my God, Fluffy,if you went the other way,

you could be a bear."