Gabriel Iglesias - Driving on the Left

Gabriel Iglesias: Aloha Fluffy Season 1, Ep 101 04/07/2013 Views: 46,979

Gabriel Iglesias explains the difference between getting hit by a bus in London and getting hit by a bus in Hawaii. (2:03)

FROM SINGAPORE, WEGOT TO GO UP

TO LONDON, ENGLAND, TO DOSOME SHOWS.

AND IT WAS PRETTY COOLOVER THERE.

OBVIOUSLY, THEY SPOKE ENGLISH.

THE ONLY ISSUES THAT I HAD INLONDON, ENGLAND, WERE THAT,

OVER THERE, THEY DRIVE ON THEOPPOSITE SIDE OF THE STREET,

AND THAT IS VERY--YOU KNOW,THAT'S KIND OF CHALLENGING FOR

TOURISTS, BECAUSE WHEN YOU'RECROSSING THE STREET, YOU'RE

AUTOMATICALLY CONDITIONEDTO COME OUT, LOOK LEFT, LOOK

RIGHT, LOOK LEFT AGAIN,AND THEN YOU CROSS.

AND SO, WHEN YOU'RE THERE, YOUHAVE TO RETRAIN YOURSELF,

BECAUSE YOU'LL COME OUT, ANDYOU THINK YOU'RE COOL.

"LOOK, THERE'S NO CARS COMING.

LET'S GO."

[imitating engine][screams]

EVERY OTHER BLOCK IS LIKE THEMOVIE FINAL DESTINATION.

YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

AND OVER THERE, THEY GOTDOUBLE-DECKER BUSES.

THOSE SUCKERS ARE HEAVY.

YOU GET HIT BY ONE OF THOSEAT 30 MILES AN HOUR...

[groans]YOU KNOW?

AT LEAST IF YOU GET HIT BY A BUSHERE ON THE ISLAND, YOU HAVE

SO MUCH OF A CHANCE.

FIRST OF ALL, NOBODY'S INA HURRY.

YOU GET HIT BY A BUS HERE...

[imitates horn honking]"HEY, BRO,

WALK IT OFF.

ARE YOU OKAY?""SHOOTS!"

"ALL RIGHT."

I'VE BEEN TO THE NEWS STATIONHERE.

I'VE BEEN ON THE NEWS MANYTIMES, AND THEY'RE ALWAYS--

YOU KNOW, PEOPLE ALWAYS WOULDSTEP OFF THE CURB.

THEY'RE NOT PAYING ATTENTION.

THEY'RE LOOKING AT THEBUILDINGS, OR THEY'RE TAKING

PICTURES, AND YOU KNOW...

[imitates horn honking]YOU KNOW, AND THEY REPORT THEM,

YOU KNOW?

"A MAN WAS STRUCK BY A BUSHERE TODAY.

HIS LEG WAS BROKEN.

DOCTORS SAY HE WILL BE OKAY."

LONDON, ENGLAND, GETTING HITBY A DOUBLE-DECKER BUS GOING 30?

[chuckles]"A MAN EXPLODED TODAY

WHEN HE WAS STRUCK BYA DOUBLE-DECKER BUS.

WE HAVE VIDEO FOOTAGE."

[imitates horn honking]