(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)>> Stephen: WELCOME BACK,EVERYBODY!
THANK YOU SO MUCH!
YOU KNOW, FOLKS, I DON'T THINKIT COMES TO A SURPRISE THAT I
ENJOY A LIBATION FROM TIME TOTIME.
THERE'S NOTHING LIKE A STIFFDRINK FOR RELAXING AT THE END OF
A STRESSFUL DAY, OR TO TAKE THEEDGE OFF WHILE DRIVING YOUR CAR
THROUGH A CROWDED CITY PARK.
BUT LET'S FACE IT -- DRINKINGCAN BE COMPLICATED.
WHERE'S THE BOTTLE OPENER BOTTLEOPENER?
WHICH GLASS DO I USE?
WHO IS THAT GUY ON TRISH'SFACEBOOK PAGE?
IS THAT DANNY FROM WORK?!
WHAT HAPPENED TO US, TRISH?WE WERE GONNA GO CAMPING.
I BOUGHT A CANOE.
FORTUNATELY, THERE'S A NEWDEVICE THAT TAKES ALL THE
GUESSWORK OUT OF GETTINGBOOZEJUICE INTO YOUR MOUTH-HOLE.
JIM?
WHAT IF THERE WAS A BRAND NEWWAY TO ENJOY YOUR ALCHOLIC
BEVERAGES THAT WILL GET THEPARTY STARTED FASTER AND WON'T
SLOW YOU DOWN.
INTRODUCTING VAPSHOT VAPORIZEDSPIRITS.
NOW YOU CAN ENJOY VAPORIZEDALCOHOL ANY TIME AT HOME OR ONE
OF YOUR AWESOME PARTIES.
VAPSHOT MINI IS DESIGNED TOVAPORIZE ALCOHOL THAT YOU CAN
INHALE WITH A STRAW.
IT HITS YOU INSTANTLY ANDKICKSTARTS YOUR BUZZ.
>> Stephen: THAT'S RIGHT!
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)VAPORIZED ALCOHOL!
FINALLY, SOMETHING THAT COMBINESTHE ELEGANCE OF DRINKING WITH
THE CONVENIENCE OF HUFFINGPAINT.
BEST PART IS, IT'S SO EASY TOUSE, ANY MINOR COULD DO IT.
JUST INVITE OVER YOUR FAVORITEAUNT, THE ONE WHO BUYS
CHARDONNAY IN BULK.
HAVE HER FILL IT WITH VODKA,REPLACE THE COVER, INSERT THE
INJECTOR INTO THE BOTTLE, PRESSTHE BUTTON.
COUNT TO 20, TWIST THE TOP ANDPRESTO-MISTO!
BOOM!
YOU ARE READY TO INHALE YOUR WAYTO A FREE AMBULANCE RIDE.
(LAUGHTER)AND PARENTS, YOU CAN REST
ASSURED - THE VAPSHOT MINI ISPERFECTLY SAFE, AS PROVEN BY A
CHART.
>> VAPSHOT IS THE ONLYLABORATORY PRODUCT FOR
VAPORIZING ALCOHOL USINGINFORMATION PUBLISHED BY OSHA,
ONE OF THE MOST RESPECTED.
AGENCIES FOR SAFETY.
VAPSHOT IS WELL WITHIN THEACCEPTABLE LEVELS FOR INHALING
ETHYL ALCOHOL.
>> Stephen: YES!
(APPLAUSE)LOOK AT THAT!
(LAUGHTER)YES.
ACCORDING TO THIS FACTORY AIRPOLLUTANT GRAPH, VAPSHOT WILL
HAVE YOU PARTYING --(LAUGHTER)
(CHEERS AND APPLAUSE)VAPSHOT WILL HAVE YOU PARTYING
NEARLY AS HARD AS THE CLEANINGCREW AT A POORLY VENTILATED
ACETONE PLANT.
(LAUGHTER)BUT IF ANYTHING, THE SQUARES AT
THE OCCUPATIONAL SAFETY ANDHEALTH ADMINISTRATION ARE
PLAYING IT TOO SAFE.
LOOK AT THAT GAP -- OR AS I CALLIT, THE "BRAIN CELL BERMUDA
TRIANGLE."
(LAUGHTER)THERE'S SO MUCH MORE FUN YOU
COULD PROBABLY NON-FATALLY HAVE.
JUST IGNORE THE VERY BEGINNINGOF THE CHART WHERE VAPSHOT IS
"OUTSIDE" THE SAFETY ZONE.
NOTHING TO WORRY ABOUT.
ONLY THE FIRST VAPSHOT WILLKILL YOU, BUT AFTER THAT, YOU'RE
IN THE CLEAR!
(LAUGHTER)(APPLAUSE)
OF COURSE, WHEN WE FACT-CHECKEDTHAT CHART, OSHA TOLD US THEY
"DON'T KNOW WHAT VAPSHOT ISBASING THEIR INFORMATION ON."
VAPSHOT MAY HAVE FAKED THEIRCHART?
THAT IS VERY SOBERING.
BUT NOT FOR LONG.
(LAUGHTER)THE IMPORTANT THING IS, NO
MATTER HOW DANGEROUS IT ISN'T,VAPSHOT GETS YOU CRUNKED FAST!
ACCORDING TO VAPSHOT'S WEBSITE.
"NORMALLY WHEN YOU TAKE A DRINK,IT HAS TO GO INTO YOUR MOUTH,
DOWN YOUR THROAT, INTO.
YOUR STOMACH, THEN INTESTINESAND FINALLY INTO YOUR
BLOODSTREAM TO YOUR LUNGS ANDBRAIN.
THAT TAKES A LONG TIME AND AWHOLE LOT MORE ALCOHOL TO HAVE
THE SAME EFFECT."
"VAPSHOT INTRODUCES THE ALCOHOLDIRECTLY INTO THE BLOOD STREAM
THROUGH THE LUNGS WHICH IS VERYEFFICIENT."
(LAUGHTER)YES!
EFFICIENT!
SO YOU CAN BE THE FIRST AT THEPARTY TO BE PASSED OUT WITH A
PENIS DRAWN ON YOUR FACE!
(APPLAUSE)(LAUGHTER)
BUT, FOLKS, DON'T TAKE MY WORDFOR IT.
LISTEN TO SOMEONE WHO VAPESHOTDIDN'T CONSULT IN.
THEIR COMMERCIAL:AN ACTUAL DOCTOR.
>> THE NORMAL SENSATION WHEN YOUDRINK AND YOU GET-- YOU FEEL
LIKE YOU'RE MORE DRUNK IS TOVOMIT.
IT'S YOUR BODY'S WAY OFEXPELLING ALCOHOL.
HOWEVER, WHEN YOU INHALEALCOHOL, YOUR BRAIN HAS NO WAY
OF EXPELLING IT.
>> SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT PRAYINGTO THE PORCELAIN GOD.
WITH VAPSHOT, YOU JUST MIGHTGET TO MEET THE REAL THING.
(LAUGHTER)AND AT ONLY $899, WHAT ARE YOU
WAITING FOR?
ORDER YOUR VAPSHOT TODAY!
VAPESHOT: BECAUSE LUNGS DON'TVOMIT.
WE'LL BE RIGHT BACK.