Harland Williams - Ass-Face

Morris, Carter, DeRay, Larkin Season 4, Ep 0409 12/11/2000 Views: 1,361

Cosmetic surgery has its ups and downs. (1:02)

YOU ARE A BEAUTIFUL-LOOKING

CROWD.

ANYONE HERE HAVE COSMETIC

SURGERY?

EVERYONE'S DOING COSMETIC

SURGERY, MAN.

MY SISTER HAD THIS PROCEDURE

WHERE SHE GOES IN, SHE GETS SOME

OF THE FAT SUCKED OUT OF HER

BOTTOM AND INJECTED INTO HER

CHEEKS TO GIVE HER THAT FULLER

FACIAL LOOK.

NOW THE BAD NEWS IS SHE DOESN'T

LOOK ANY BETTER.

BUT THE GOOD NEWS IS,

I NOW OFFICIALLY GET TO CALL HER

"ASS-FACE."

(LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE)

AND THEN SHE GOES ONE STEP

FURTHER.

SHE GOES OUT, SHE GETS HER

TONGUE PIERCED.

SHE GETS A STEEL BOLT PUT

THROUGH THE MIDDLE OF HER

TONGUE.

AND I SAY TO HER, I SAY,

YOU KNOW, "ASS-FACE, WHY?"

(LAUGHTER)

I JUST DON'T GET THE WHOLE

BODY-PIERCING THING, MAN.

THE OTHER DAY I SAW SOME KID,

HE HAD EIGHT RINGS THROUGH HIS

EYEBROWS.

I DIDN'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I RAN UP AND HUNG A SHOWER

CURTAIN ON HIS FACE.

(LAUGHTER AND AP