#HashtagWars - #OverheardAtRNC

Tuesday, July 19, 2016 07/19/2016 Views: 249

Lauren Lapkus, Matt Besser and Dave Holmes share the typical chatter overheard at the Republican National Convention. (1:43)

It's now timefor tonight's #HashtagWars.


The RepublicanNational Convention

is a sanctum for diverseopinions and voices.

In fact, there's a podiumand mike set up outside

where anyone can step upand speak their minds.

He makes you eata bucket of flour

to impress some girlyou met down at the bar,

and when you stop eating he hitsyou in the face with a belt.

You got to say,"Thanks, stepdad!"

-MAN: This is getting weird.-That's what you got to do.



Ladies love it whenyou eat a bucket of flour.

-(laughter) -If that guy thinksit's getting weird,

just wait until he steps footinside the actual convention.

Comedians, since the RNCis crawling with guys

like our weird friend here,tonight's hashtag is

#OverheardAtRNC.Examples might be:

I just got bitby Mike Huckabee's possum;

and: I think that's my hood.Is that a medium?

Uh, let's put 60 secondson the clock, and begin.

-Lauren. -Gather round,we're gonna watch Ted Cruz

get his diaper changed.

-(laughter)-Points. Dave.

It's a real white privilegeto be here.

-All right, points. Matt.-(laughter)

Hey, where's that guy goingwith the photo copier

and Michelle Obama's speech?

All right, points. Dave.

I'm not a bigot-- I have a lotof friends of inferior races.

All right, points.

-Lauren Lapkus.-I hear night three

is just Guy Fierilighting his farts on fire.

-(laughter)-Points. Dave.

Is Grindr loading slowlyfor you, too?

-Yeah, points.-Okay.


What sitcom did that speakerused to be in?

Uh, Joanie Loves Nazi?

All right, points.

Uh, Matt.

Uh, Muslim?I don't even know 'im.

-(laughter)-All right. Points.