Godfrey - Bodega

Ricca, Godfrey, Rich, Greenberg Season 3, Ep 0311 02/08/2000 Views: 12,124

Every bodega has a Latin cat. (2:41)

ANYONE HERE FROM QUEENS?

YEAH!

I USED TO LIVERIGHT BY THE BODEGA.

YOU KNOW WHAT THE BODEGA IS.

IT'S THE LITTLE LATIN STORE.

AND THEY TRY TO ACT LIKEIT'S A GROCERY STORE.

IT HAS TWO AISLES.

THE GUY ALWAYS TRIES TO HELP ME.

( Spanish accent ):"YOU LOOKING FOR THE BREAD?"

I WAS LIKE, "I CAN SEE ITRIGHT HERE, ALL RIGHT?"

HE'S LIKE,"IT'S IN AISLE TWO."

"THAT'S ALL YOU GOT.

WHAT YOU TALKING ABOUT?"

EVERY BODEGA HAS A CAT.

( laughter )

EL GATO.

THIS IS A LATIN CAT.

THIS ISN'T THAT STUFFYOU SEE ON TV.

( high-pitched meowing )

NO, THIS IS A LATIN CAT.

EL GATO BEEN WORKINGIN THE BODEGA

FOR, LIKE, 30 YEARS.

AND HE WANTS TO KILLTHE TACO BELL DOG.

DON'T LIKE HIM.

AND YOU KNOW, MOST CATSYOU CAN SCARE AWAY, RIGHT?

YOU SEE A CAT ON THE STREET--"GET OUT OF HERE!"

( meowing )

NOT EL GATO.

I TRIED TO SCARE EL GATO--"GET OUT OF HERE!"

HE SAID, "YOU GET OUT OF HERE!"

"HOMBRE CHOCOLATE, I DON'T LIKE YOU!"

I WAS, LIKE, "SORRY."I LEFT, YOU KNOW.

THEN I DON'T KNOWHOW HE GOT MY NUMBER.

I WAS, LIKE, "OH, MY GOD!"

HE WAS ON MY CALLER I.D.

IT WAS LIKE, "EL GATO."

( laughter )

I SAID, "HELLO?"

"EL MEOW."

WHAT IN THE...?!

THEN HE CALLED BACKLIKE AN HOUR LATER--

"HELLO?"

"SAMMY SOSA!"

WHAT?! HE KNOWS ABOUT BASEBALL!

WHAT IS GOING ON?

I'M FROM CHICAGO.

YES.

YEAH. I WAS BORN IN NEBRASKA.

( laughter )

LIKE I HAD A CHOICE.

YOU KNOW, LIKE, I COULD COME OUTOF MY MOM AND SAY--

OH, SORRY, MA,I WANT TO BE BORN IN BROOKLYN.

NO, THAT'S IT,YOU'RE BORN, YOU'RE BORN.

LET ME TELL YOU THE REASON--

I'M NIGERIAN, ALL RIGHT? 100%.

AND THAT'S JUST THE THINGABOUT NIGERIANS.

WHEREVER THERE'S A SCHOOL--

MY FATHERWENT TO SCHOOL OUT THERE--

WHEREVER THERE'S A SCHOOL,THERE'S A NIGERIAN, MAN.

DOESN'T MATTER.

IT COULD BE K.K.K. UNIVERSITY.

( laughter )

A NIGERIAN WILL BETHE FIRST ONE TO SIGN UP.

BUT HE'LL BE HAPPY,YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

( Nigerian accent ):OH, MY GOODNESS...

( laughter )

I'M SO HAPPY.

I'M GOINGTO A VERY GREAT SCHOOL.

K.K.K. UNIVERSITY. OH!

I WAS TALKING TO MY PROFESSORTHE OTHER DAY

THE GRAND IMPERIAL WIZARD, YES.

NO, HE'S A SMART MAN.

HE'S A WIZARD.

HE TOLD ME.

HE SAID HE'S SO EXCITED.

HE CANNOT WAITTO SHOW ME THE ROPES.

OH, MY GOODNESS!

( laughter )

HE WANTS ME TO HANG AROUNDOR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

AND HE INVITED ME TO A BARBECUE.

I SAID, NO, I CANNOT GO.