Anybody? Okay, okay.
I mean, I-- I don't meanto judge you guys
but, uh, I only drinkwhen it's a special occasion.
You know, like whenit's someone's birthday
Thanks. I keep itvery classy.
I really am likea huge lightweight.
Like, I can't drink a lot.I cannot.
Because, like,if I have one drink,
I swear I'll just do somethingsuper klutzy,
like stub my toe.
The camel one.
And, uh, it's just notworth the risk, you know?
But I feel likeat every bar
there's always, like,that one overconfident guy
who has to, like,swoop in and try to talk to you.
He's always, like,70 years old.
And he has, like, one of those,like, long, cascading, gray,
sex commune ponytails.
And, like, a bolo tieand a lazy eye.
And he's like, "Oh, hey,little lady. What's your sign?"
And you're like, "Yield."
He just keeps going.
He's like,"Oh, cool. I'm a cancer."
I'm like, I know.
Everyone knowsyou are a cancer.
You are a social melanoma.
© 2016 Comedy Partners. All Rights Reserved. Comedy Central and all related titles, logos and characters are trademarks of comedy partners.