Love Lessons

  • Season 2 , Ep 5
  • 02/06/2000
  • Views: 9,844

Fry gives Dr. Zoidberg a crash course on how to attract females. (1:53)

TEACH ME TO FAKE IT.

OKAY, YOU'RE ON A DATE.

WHAT'S THE FIRST THING YOU DO?

ASK HER TO MATE WITH ME.

NO. TELL HER SHE'S SPECIAL.

BUT SHE'S NOT.

SHE'S MERELY THE FEMALEWITH THE LARGEST CLUTCH OF EGGS.

WELL, TELL HER THAT, AND THEN...

THEN MATING.

NO, MAKE UP SOME FEELINGS

AND TELL HER YOU HAVE THEM.

YES?

IS DESIRE TOMATE A FEELING?

OH, YOU'RE NOT EVEN TRYING.

( gurgles in frustration )

IT'S ALL SO COMPLICATEDWITH THE FLOWERS AND THE ROMANCE

AND THE LIES UPON LIES...

OKAY, OKAY, DON'T WORRY.

THE LOVE-MEISTERWILL TAKE YOU UNDER HIS WING.

WHAT, NOW THERE'SA BIRD INVOLVED?

OKAY, GO AHEAD.

WHAT THE...? DR. ZOIDBERG?

YOUR MATING DISPLAY FAILED.

WHY ARE YOU TRYINGTO TALK TO ME?

I HAVE NO IDEA.

YOU JUST WANT TO TALK.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DOWITH MATING.

I JUST WANT TO TALK.

IT HAS NOTHING TO DOWITH MATING.

FRY, THAT DOESN'T MAKE SENSE.

DR. ZOIDBERG, THAT DOESN'T MAKESENSE... BUT OKAY.

START WITH A COMPLIMENT.

TELL HER SHE LOOKS THIN.

YOU SEEM MALNOURISHED.

ARE YOU SUFFERINGFROM INTERNAL PARASITES?

WHY, YES. THANKS FOR NOTICING.

NOW ASK HER HOW HER DAY WAS.

WHY WOULD I WANT TO KNOW?

YOU WOULDN'T. ASK ANYWAY.

HOW WAS YOUR DAY?

WELL, FIRST, I GOT UPAND HAD A PIECE OF TOAST

THEN I BRUSHED MY TEETH

THEN I WENT TO THE STORETO BUY SOME FISH, THEN I...

FRY, LOOK WHAT YOU DID.

SHE WON'T SHUT UP.

THAT'S NORMAL.

JUST NOD YOUR HEAD AND SAY,"UH-HUH."

UH-HUH, UH-HUH.

...AND THEN YOU THREWAN OCTOPUS AT MY WINDOW.

YOU KNOW, ZOIDBERG, IT'S CRAZY,BUT WHEN YOU TALK THIS WAY

YOUR OBVIOUS DEFICIENCIESAS A MALE SEEM...

LESS OBVIOUS.

YOUR GENES SEEMLESS DETRIMENTAL.

( sniffing )

YOU EVEN STINK MORE.

DO I ASK HER TO MATE NOW?

THIRD DATE.

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