Roy Wood Jr. - Always Get a Bag

Roy Wood Jr.: Father Figure Season 1, Ep 1 02/19/2017 Views: 2,849

Roy Wood Jr. had to straighten out a Best Buy employee who didn't understand why he needed a bag after purchasing a phone case. (2:23)

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doesn't understandwhat we go through

is necessarily racistor bigoted.

That's--That's a far jump.

It's a lot of folks that juststraight-up don't know

what it's like.

And you gotta educate 'em.

You gotta educate 'em onthe kind of America you live in.

I had to go to Best Buy and givea dude some straightening.

Straighten his ass out, yeah.

I'm straightening.

Dude at Best Buy gonna decideI don't need a bag

with my purchase.

"You just have an iPhone case.

I figure you could justpop that open."

No, I ain't popping shit.You put it in a bag.

I need that in a bag.

"What do you need a bag for?

"I don't understandwhy you need a bag.

"It's wasteful.Recycle.

Don't you careabout the Earth?"

I go, "Sir, this has nothingto do with the Earth.

"I'm a black man in America.

I gotta leave this storewith a bag, bro."

(cheers and applause)

It's about safety.

I'm black, I don't getthe luxury of just walking out

with shit in my hand.

That is a roll of the dice.

That is a horrifyingday if I--

No, not only do Ineed that bag, bitch,

I need that receipt!

And staple itto the outside.

I don't want a receiptin my hand.

You staple my receiptto the outside

like Chinese carryout,

and I'll hold it up in the air,I'll "Lion King"--

I'll "Hakuna Matata"an iPhone case

out of Best Buy.

And it's not his fault.He just didn't understand.

He thought he wassaving the Earth,

but he was saving a life,that's what he was doing.

This has nothing to dowith recycling, man.

'Cause, see, you might bea cool person.

He might-- The cashiermight be a cool-ass dude,

but we don't knowwhat the security guard

been through up front.

I come prancingout of Best Buy

with this naked-assiPhone case in my hand.

And here comes security.

"Excuse me, sir.Did you pay for that?"

Oh, yeah,I got the receipt.

"He's going for a gun!"Skaboom!

♪ Oh, freedom, ohh