Nowadays, having Internet accessis just as important
as things like educationand free speech.
After all, it's how most of usapply for jobs, do our jobs,
tweet things that cause usto lose our jobs.
That is why the United NationsHuman Rights Council
has passed a non-bindingresolution condemning countries
that disrupt citizens'Internet access.
So now it's considereda basic human right
to say stuff like this.
"Y'all know that Atlanta spelledbackyards is Atlanta."
I think there are other things
that Jay do not gotbesides that juice.
-Uh...-FLEMING: No juice.
MANDYAM:Chris, he does not speak
for all Jays, all right?I just want you to know.
HARDWICK: Okay, he isa one and only Jay.
-He does not speak for all Jays.-Hashtag #notalljays.
God bless America.
Hopefully, this will leadto some sort of Internet bill
of human rights guaranteeing
that everyone has high-speedaccess to our dankest memes.
Comedians,what's something you might find
on an Internet bill of rights?
-Emily.-The right to delete
your historywhen your boyfriend gets home.
-I mean... -All right,I'll give you points.
(applause and cheering)
-Jay.-The 34th amendment is
if it exists,somebody's jerking off to it.
HARDWICK: Yeah, that's the 34thamendment, I believe.
Uh, I think it was Ben Franklinwho said that.
Uh, John Ross Bowie.
You have the rightto a speedy trial
of middle schoolers calling youHitler in the comment section.