Owen Benjamin - Intense Story

  • Season 14 , Ep 3
  • 01/11/2010
  • Views: 12,274

After a crazy experience in college, Owen Benjamin won't smoke marijuana anymore. (1:53)

BUT I DON'T DO DRUGS.

I DON'T EVEN SMOKE WEED.

I USED TO.I USED TO SMOKE WEED.

THEN SOMETHING REALLY CRAZYHAPPENED TO ME,

AND I JUST NEVER SMOKED AGAIN.

I WAS IN COLLEGE,

AND I WAS, UH...

YOU GUYS LIKE STORIES?YOU WANT TO HEAR A STORY?

YEAH!YEAH!YEAH!YEAH!

I WAS IN COLLEGE,

AND WE'RE SITTING ON MY FRIEND'SPORCH, AND WE'RE HIGH.

AND HIS DOG CAME HOME WITH ADEAD POODLE IN HIS MOUTH, RIGHT?

YEAH.THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING.

[ LAUGHTER ]

AND WE RECOGNIZED THE POODLE.

IT WAS HIS NEIGHBOR'S POODLE,THIS WOMAN NAMED AGNES,

WHO WAS AN OLDER WOMAN,VERY SWEET.

AND, UH, WHEN YOU'RE HIGH,YOU MAKE TERRIBLE DECISIONS.

YOU KNOW, WE'RE LIKE,"IF WE, UH -- BRO."

YOU KNOW, WE'RE LIKE,"IF WE -- IF WE TELL SOMEBODY,

THEY'RE GONNA KILL YOUR DOG."

AND I WAS LIKE, "THEY MIGHT EVENKILL US," YOU KNOW?

SO WE DID WHAT ANY HIGH PERSONWOULD DO.

WE WENT TO THE YARD, ANDWE REATTACHED IT TO ITS LEASH,

AND WE PRETENDED IT DIEDON ITS OWN.

[ LIGHT LAUGHTER ]

SO THEN WE GO BACK TO THE PORCH,AND WE THINK WE JUST PULLED OFF,

YOU KNOW, WHAT WAS THE GREATESTTHING TO DO IN THAT SITUATION.

AND WE HEAR THE WOMAN SCREAM.

WHOO!

YOU SHOULDN'T APPLAUDAT THAT POINT.

IT'S SAD.AGNES IS A GOOD WOMAN.

YOU STOP IT.

[ LAUGHTER ]

SO, AGNES RUNS OVER, HOLDINGTHIS DEAD POODLE IN HER HANDS,

AND SHE'S LIKE, "WHAT MONSTERWOULD DO SUCH A THING?"

AND WE'RE LIKE, "IT LOOKS LIKEIT DIED ON ITS OWN," YOU KNOW?

SHE'S LIKE,"IT DIED TWO DAYS AGO!

SOMEONE DUG IT UPAND REATTACHED IT TO ITS LEASH."

I WAS LIKE, "OH, MY GOD!"

AAH!

[ LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE ]

IT'S INTENSE, RIGHT?

[ LAUGHTER ]

LET IT OUT.REALLY THINK IT THROUGH.

THINK ABOUT WHAT WENT THROUGHHER HEAD.

[ LAUGHTER ]

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