Rachel Feinstein - Mom Boss

Jobrani, Bearden, Feinstein, Fisch Season 8, Ep 0812 12/03/2004 Views: 10,854

Rachel Feinstein loves men who think it's her naughty little idea to be a woman. (2:40)

NONSENSE SCREAMED AT ME ON THE

STREET AS I'M SURE A LOT OF

YOU DO.

UH, BUT MY FAVORITE IS WHEN

MEN TALK TO YOU LIKE IT'S YOUR

NAUGHTY LITTLE IDEA TO BE A

WOMAN.

[LAUGHTER]

LIKE THE OTHER DAY I WAS WALKING

AND THIS GUY GOES "AWE, SEE

THAT'S TOO MUCH.

[LAUGHTER]

NAH GIRL THAT'S TOO MUCH!"

AND IT WORKED, I FELT SLIGHTLY

GUILTY AND SOILED SOMEHOW.

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

BUT WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING LATELY

IS I JUST TALK BACK TO MEN IN

THE TWO MOST HEINOUS JARRING

VOICES I KNOW.

WHICH ARE MY MOTHER'S AND MY

GRANDMOTHER'S.

SO THE OTHER DAY I WAS WALKING

AND I SCRATCHED MY STOMACH AND

THIS GUY GOES, "I'M SAYIN',

BOO.

CAN I SCRATCH THAT FOR YOU?"

SO I JUST ANSWERED HIM IN THE

SAME VOICE MY MOM WOULD USE

WHEN I WAS A YOUNG GIRL AND

I WANTED TO HAVE A SLEEP OVER.

I JUST GO [WISCONSIN DRAWL]

"ABSOLUTELY NOT."

[LAUGHTER, CHEERS & APPLAUSE]

"AND I, AND I DON'T HAVE TO

SAY WHY?

OKAY, WHY IS WHY."

[LAUGHTER]

"'CAUSE I'M THE MOM BOSS,

THAT'S WHY."

AND THEN I JUST SORT OF LUNGE,

'CAUSE A FORWARD JAZZY LUNGE

IS NEVER REALLY AN ATTRACTIVE

POSITION.

[LAUGHTER]

I ALSO LOVE IT WHEN MEN TRY

TO ACT REALLY GALLANT AND FANCY

AT REALLY SLOPPY TIMES.

LIKE I WAS LEAVING THIS BAR

WITH MY FRIENDS AT 3:45 IN THE

MORNING WHICH IS LAST CALL FOR

ASS AS WELL SO MEN ARE WALKING

AROUND SHAKING.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

AND THEN THESE GUYS WALK UP TO

US, MY FAVORITE TYPES, SORT OF

DATE RAPING JOCKS.

AND THEY GO, "WHAT ARE YOU TWO

LOVELY LADIES..."

AND THEY HE REALLY DID SORT OF

STOP AND VOMIT.

[LAUGHTER]

HE STRUGGLED WITH A VOMIT...

[LAUGHTER CONTINUES]

AND THEN HE SAID, "...DOING ON

THIS PARTICULARLY LOVELY

EVENING?"

[LAUGHTER]

SO I JUST ANSWERED HIM IN MY

GRANDMOTHER'S VOICE.

I GO, "WELL, ACTUALLY I HAVE

THIS TERRIBLE ITCH.

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

IT'S RIGHT BETWEEN MY CROTCH

AND MY THIGH, AYE.

AND I THINK IF IT KEEPS

BURNING LIKE THIS, I OUGHT TO

JUST SEND MYSELF HOME,

AHHHHHHH."

[LAUGHTE