Cathy Ladman - Tammy Doll

Cathy Ladman & Barry Sobel Season 1, Ep 62 02/24/1992 Views: 3,768

The Tammy doll came with her own low self-esteem. (3:16)

THAT'S A GREAT AGE.

SHE LIKES TO CHOOSE WORDSAT RANDOM

AND THEN REPEAT THEMINCESSANTLY.

LIKE I WENT TO VISIT THEM ANDSHE'S WALKING AROUND THE HOUSE

SHE'S GOING, "GREAT, GREAT,GREAT, GREAT, GREAT, GREAT..."

SHE FINALLY STOPS HOURS LATER.

SHE GOES, "YOU KNOW, I'M STILLSAYING GREAT... IN MY HEAD."

( laughter )

REALLY?

SO IS EVERYONE ELSEIN THE HOUSE.

( laughter )

SHE HAD A BIRTHDAYSO I HAD TO GET HER A GIFT

SO I WENT TO TOYS R USBECAUSE SHE'S REGISTERED THERE.

AND I WAS GOINGTO GET HER A BARBIE DOLL.

DO YOU KNOW THERE'S NOTJUST ONE BARBIE ANYMORE?

THERE'S THIS HUGE VARIETYOF BARBIE DOLLS.

THEY HAVE "FUN TIME" BARBIE,"AVIATION" BARBIE.

OH, GET THIS ONE--"GIFT-GIVING" KEN.

( laughter )

YEAH, I REALLY DON'T THINK THISIS GOING TO PREPARE MY NIECE

FOR ADULT RELATIONSHIPS.

HOW ABOUT "DATE-BREAKING" KEN?

( applause )

"I STILL LIVEWITH MY MOTHER" KEN.

( laughter )

"OH, YOU DON'T MINDIF MY FRIEND BOB JOINS US?" KEN.

SO I GOT THIS BARBIE DOLLAND I WAS JEALOUS

BECAUSE I NEVER HAD A BARBIEWHEN I WAS GROWING UP.

I HAD A TAMMY DOLL.

SHE WAS LIKE "BRAND X" BARBIE.

YOU KNOW, THE DOLL THAT CAMEWITH HER OWN LOW SELF-ESTEEM.

SHE HAD A STRINGON HER NECK, I PULLED IT

SHE SAID, "YEAH, I KNOW,I'M NOT BARBIE."

BARBIE HAD ALLTHESE GREAT ACCESSORIES.

SHE CAME WITH THE DREAM HOUSE.

TAMMY CAME WITH A STRAIGHT RAZORWITH BAND-AIDS

TO COVER THE CUTS ON HER LEGS.

WHAT A LOSER.

TAMMY.

YOU KNOWWHERE MY TAMMY DOLL LIVED?

MY TAMMY DOLL LIVEDIN THE BOTTOM OF MY CLOSET

IN A BOOT BOXAND SHE WAS LUCKY TO HAVE IT.

THAT'S RIGHT,BECAUSE I TREATED HER

JUST LIKE MY PARENTS TREATED ME.

MY PARENTS WOULD SAY,"YOU'RE LUCKY TO HAVE THAT!"

I WOULD TURN TO TAMMY,"YOU'RE LUCKY TO HAVE THAT!"

( laughter )

OH, MY FAVORITE TOY.

NOT REALLY A TOY,BUT CRAYOLA 64 BOX.

SEE?

IT'S LIKE A CHILD'S ORGASM.

IT'S SO GOOD.

I WOULD GET A 64 BOXLIKE, "O-OH!"

"IT'S GOT A SHARPENER? OHHH!"

( laughter )

"HOLD MY CALLS."

I'D GO UPSTAIRS TO MY BEDROOM

I'D BE FONDLING THE GOLD,SILVER, COPPER AND BRONZE.

THESE DON'T COMEIN THE SMALLER BOXES.

AND I WOULDN'T LET ANYBODYTOUCH MY NEW CRAYONS.

"DON'T TOUCH THOSE,THOSE ARE MY NEW CRAYONS.

YOU CAN'T PEEL THE PAPER,ONLY I CAN PEEL THE PAPER."

THEN I WOULD COLOR IN SOME REALANAL RETENTIVE FASHION.

YOU KNOW, OPEN A COLORING BOOK.

MY EYE RIGHT ON THE CRAYON,OUTLINING THE COLORS.

( groaning )

CRACK!

OH, HERE YOU GO.

YOU CAN PLAY WITH THAT NOW.