Damon Wayans - Being a Celebrity

Season 9 , Ep 902 12/02/05 Views: 6,903

It's fun being a celebrity. (2:10)

IT'S NICE.YOU KNOW IT'S FUN BEING,

LIKE, A CELEBRITY. 'CAUSE YOU WALK DOWN THE STREET

AND PEOPLE JUST RECOGNIZE-- SOMETIMES, THOUGH, PEOPLE--

- HEY, DAMON!- HEY, BABY. WHAT'S UP?

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

IT FEELS GOOD. SOMETIME PEOPLE CALL YOU

LIKE THEY KNOW YOU, THOUGH.YOU WALKING DOWN THERE.

"DAMON WAYANS!"WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? WHAT?AND THEN THEY GET MAD,

YOU KNOW IF YOU DON'T, LIKE,ACKNOWLEDGE THEM, YOU KNOW? SAY,

"HEY, DAMON WAYANS, WHAT'S UP?" SAY, "HEY, HOW YOU DOING?"

"COME HERE, TALK TO ME,[BLEEP]. COME HERE!"

I'M JUST, LIKE, "MAN, I GOT TO GO."

"MAN, MARLON'STHE FUNNY ONE, ANYWAY."

[LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

AND THEN PEOPLE WANT ME TO ENTERTAIN THEM ALL THE TIME. YOU KNOW?

THEY SAY, "HEY, DO HOMEY THE CLOWN."

[CHEERS, WHISTLES & APPLAUSE]

LIKE--

I CARRY THE SOCK AND THE NOSE WITH ME EVERYWHERE I GO.

"JUST DO THE CLOWN, MAN. DO THE CLOWN."

[CHEERS AND APPLAUSE]

YOU SEE, YOU KNOW I WAS ABOUT TO DO IT.

I REALIZE WHAT I NEED TO DO IS START BEING MORE AGGRESSIVE.

'CAUSE I DON'T WANT TO BE ONE OF THESE CELEBRITIES

THAT JUST BECOMES A RECLUSE. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

THAT'S WHEN YOU STARTHANGING OUT WITH MONKEYSAND STUFF, YOU KNOW?

SO I THINK WHAT I'M GONNA START DOING IS GOING OUT

AND MEETING THE FANS BEFORE THEY MEET ME.

I'M GONNA GIVE THEM A TASTE OF WHAT IT'S LIKE

TO BE A CELEBRITY.WALK UP TO THEM AND THEYMIGHT BE EATING AT--

"HEY, WHAT'S UP, MAN?LOOK WHO HERE.

- "DAMON WAYANS! - [LAUGHTER AND APPLAUSE]

"OH, THIS YOUR ANNIVERSARY DINNER?

"WELL, LET ME GET SOME. IS THIS THE ANNIVERSARY GIRL?

- "COME HERE GIVE ME A KISS. - [LAUGHTER]

"YEAH, THAT'S DAMON WAYANS' SPIT IN YOUR MOUTH.

"OH, LET I GET THIS STRAIGHT. YOU WANT ME TO GET UP

"AND GET THE HELL OUT OF YOUR FACE

"AND LEAVE YOU AND YOUR WOMAN ALONE

"SO Y'ALL CAN ENJOY THIS NIGHT TOGETHER?

I DON'T THINK SO. HOMEY DON'T PLAY THAT." BAM!

[CHEERS, WHISTLES & APPLAUSE]

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