The Roast of Bill

  • Season 3 , Ep 11
  • 01/16/2013
  • Views: 7,841

The employees at TelAmeriCorp take turns insulting Bill at his 20th anniversary roast. (2:58)

♪ OF THE FREE-UH

♪ AND THAT [bleep]BILL'S GAY-UH ♪

[cheers and applause]

AND I'M OUT.HAVE FUN ROASTING THIS BALD PIG.

- GREAT JOB, BRADLEY!

- WHO'S BRADLEY?I'M TONY CLIFTON, YOU ASSHOLE.

WAKE UP!all: OH!

- BILL TREAT HIS NOSELIKE THE HOMETOWN BUFFET!

- WHAT'S THE WORST JOBIN THE WORLD?

BEING BILL'S PANTS,'CAUSE YOU KNOW

YOU'RE GONNA GET DOOKIED ON![laughter]

- HE HAS A BOOGER PASTA BAR,A BOOGER DESSERT BAR,

A BOOGER SERVING STATION...

- YES, BILL, YOU LOOK LIKEA GODDAMN CHILD MOLESTER.

- BILL BE PICKING HIS BOOGERSLIKE HE ORVILLE REDENBACHER.

POP, POP, POP, POP, POP, POP![laughter]

- I GOT THREE WORDSFOR YOU, BROTHER.

WASH YOUR STINKIN' ASS!

[laughter]

- OKAY, OUR NEXT ROASTERS WANTEDTO DO IT AS A THREESOME.

AND THEY ALSO WANTEDTO PERFORM TOGETHER.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S GIVE IT UPFOR ADAM, ANDERS, AND BLAKE!

WHOO!- SHAGADELIC!

DO I MAKE YOU RANDY, BABY?

- SHWING![laughs]

- TICKLE, TICKLE,BREAK THE PICKLE.

- EXCELLENT.

- [British accent]WE WERE LISTENING OUT THERE,

YOU KNOW, AND YOU GUYS WERE

ROASTING BILL PRETTY HARD.

AND HE'S MY MATE,

SO I'M HERE TO TELL YOUTO BEHAVE, BABY, YEAH!

- ALL RIGHT.

WE'RE NOT WORTHYOF SUCH A GREAT CO-WORKER.

WE'RE NOT WORTHY!WE'RE NOT WORTHY!

[all boo]

- I GOT IT.

[Indian accent]MARISKA HARGITAY.

MARI-SKA HARGITAY!

[crowd booing loudly]

[siren wails]- Y'ALL STOP!

- TICKLE, TICKLE,BREAK THE PICKLE.

- YOU ALREADY DID THIS.

HEY, COME ON.- OW!

THAT HURT MY ANKLE.

HAVE YOU GUYS REALLY NOT SEEN LOVE GURU?

IT'S A FUNNY, FUNNY MOVIE.

MIKE MYERS IS IN IT.- YEAH, WAYNE'S WORLD ONE.

- IT'S, LIKE,ONE OF THE BIGGEST COMEDIES

OF, LIKE, THE EARLY MID-2000s.- ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT, LOOK.

WE'RE SORRY YOU DON'T LIKE

OUR CHARACTERS,BUT WE'RE FUNNY GUYS.

AND WE FOLLOWED BILLTHIS WEEKEND.

AND GUESS WHAT HE DOESON THE WEEKEND?

HE PAINTS HIMSELF SILVERLIKE A ROBOT

AND GOES ON THE STREETAND BEGS FOR MONEY.

[chuckling]AND THEN--AND THEN WE ALSO

CAUGHT HIM STEALING A SANDWICH,

BECAUSE HE'S THAT POOR, GUYS.[laughter]

- THIS ISN'T WHAT WE PLANNED.WHAT ARE YOU DOING?

- IT'S ALL TRUE. IT'S ALL TRUE.WE FOLLOWED HIM.

AND GUESS WHAT WE SAW?

WE SAW THIS BROKE-ASS FOOLSUCK HIS OWN [bleep]!

- WHAT?[laughter]

- HE'S GOOD AT IT.- THAT'S HILARIOUS.

- ENOUGH!

YOU GUYS SAIDYOU WERE ON MY SIDE!

- SURE, WHATEVER, MAN.- THEY LOVE IT, MAN.

- YOU'RE RIGHT.MY LIFE IS A JOKE.

BUT I HAVE NEWS FOR YOU![gun cocks]

all: OH!

THIS IS WHERE THE JOKE ENDS!

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