Joe Machi - Human Shield

Joe Machi Season 5, Ep 3 09/02/2016 Views: 1,113

If Joe Machi were part of the Secret Service, he wouldn't be the most respected agent, but he would be the safest one. (1:01)

I think the toughest jobin the world, though,

is working forthe Secret Service,

protecting the president.

'Cause you haveto be a human shield.

That's why if I workedfor the Secret Service,

I would buy a shield.

And I would bring my shieldto work every day.

And the other employeeswould say,

"Hey Joe, what are you doingwith that shield?

You're supposedto be the shield."

And I'd be like,"Well, thousands of years ago,

"humans realizedwe make terrible shields.

"That's why we invented...


"So we don't have to be shields.

"I feel sillyexplaining shields.

"But let's make a deal,

"if this shield doesn't work,I'll duck.

"You'll do betteron your performance appraisal,

but I won't be dead."

People everywhere will say,

"That Joe sure is a coward."

And I'm like, "Is a coward.

Not was a coward."