I think the toughest jobin the world, though,
is working forthe Secret Service,
protecting the president.
'Cause you haveto be a human shield.
That's why if I workedfor the Secret Service,
I would buy a shield.
And I would bring my shieldto work every day.
And the other employeeswould say,
"Hey Joe, what are you doingwith that shield?
You're supposedto be the shield."
And I'd be like,"Well, thousands of years ago,
"humans realizedwe make terrible shields.
"That's why we invented...
"So we don't have to be shields.
"I feel sillyexplaining shields.
"But let's make a deal,
"if this shield doesn't work,I'll duck.
"You'll do betteron your performance appraisal,
but I won't be dead."
People everywhere will say,
"That Joe sure is a coward."
And I'm like, "Is a coward.
Not was a coward."