Joe DeVito - British Teeth

Season 1, Ep 0104 07/20/2006 Views: 4,787

How can a whole country have tooth decay? (2:50)

So, I've been tempingat the job that laid me off.

And that's awkward 'cause...

everybody knows I got canned

and they think I've come backto shoot them.

'Cause you've seen what thoseoffice shooters look like.

I would never do that though,

'cause I think I'm moreof a strangler.

You need that personal touch.

It's kind of hardto strangle a whole office

'cause word gets around.

I hate it when they came aroundwith the annual review.

It's, like, don't bother mewith that.

I'm trying to look busy.

Can't a man runa fantasy football team

without these interruptions?

"What are your long-term goals?

What are your short-term goals?"

Well, my short-term goalis to not fall asleep

while you're talking to me,

and my long-term goal

is to steal an entire Xeroxmachine piece by piece.

So I'm single.

It's weird 'cause I always knew

I was going to diebroke and alone.

I just didn't know I was goingto live that way, too.

There's a lot to rememberwhen you go on a date.

I always forgetsomething important

like which wine goeswith pepper spray?

I went on a bad datewith a foreign girl.

She was from England.

She complained all night.

"You Americans, you're so lazy.

"I saw a sign for a nightclub.

"You spelled it 'N-I-T-E,'and not 'N-I-G-H-T.'

"How come you're so lazy?

Can't use a proper spelling?"

I said, "Really?

What's up with your teeth?"

Have you seen English teeth?

They look like baked beans.It's disgusting.

You can't talk trashwith a mouth like that.

Those candy corns pointingin all different directions.

Good evening, guv'nor.

Care for a spot of gingivitis?

How can a whole countryhave tooth decay?

Is there a whole countrythat has body odor?

So I went out with thisFrench girl...