Jack Coen - Spanking

  • Season 2 , Ep 11
  • 09/03/1999
  • Views: 6,318

Jack doesn't hit his children. (1:54)

I HAVE A SON, UH, 13,AND MY DAUGHTER'S EIGHT

AND THEY'RE REALLY GOOD KIDS.

SMART--GEEZ, THEY'RE REAL SMART.

STRAIGHT "A" STUDENTS.

MY SON IS IN THOSEGIFTED CHILD PROGRAMS.

HE'S WAY... HE'S SO SMART

I'M LIKE THAT CLOSETO A BLOOD TEST.

OH, PLEASE, HE'S INTHE GIFTED CHILD PROGRAM.

I WENT TO SCHOOLON THE LITTLE BUS.

( laughing )

THEY'RE GOOD KIDS.

WE DON'T HIT OUR CHILDREN.

MY WIFE TOLD MEIT WOULD BE A GOOD IDEA

THAT WE DIDN'T HIT THEM.

WE DO THE TIME-OUT METHOD

'CAUSE IT WORKS SO GOODIN HOCKEY.

NO, YOU KNOW WHAT?

I HAVE A BROTHER SIX-THREE

AND I NEVER APPRECIATEDBEING THE SMALL GUY GETTING HIT

AND I NEVER WANT TO HIT

A SMALLER PERSON THAN ME,YOU KNOW?

MY SON, HE'S ONLY 13AND HE'S ALREADY MY HEIGHT.

SO I'M REAL GLAD I DIDN'T HITHIM WHEN HE WAS YOUNG.

AS IT IS, I'M SCARED TO DEATHWHEN I'M 60

HE'S GOING TO HOLD ME DOWNAND TICKLE ME TILL I PEE.

NOT SO FUNNY, IS IT, DAD?

STOP!I DON'T HAVE MY DEPENDS ON, BOY.

KNOCK IT OFF.

BUT, YOU KNOW,IF THE TRUTH BE KNOWN

I DON'T HIT MY CHILDREN

BECAUSE I REALLY DON'T THINKI COULD HIT THEM A LITTLE.

( laughing )

YOU KNOW, I'M THE KIND OF GUY,WHEN I COMMIT TO VIOLENCE

I REALLY COMMIT TO VIOLENCE,YOU KNOW.

I DON'T KNOW HOW PEOPLE DO IT.

I COULD NEVER GO:YOU'VE BEEN A BAD BOY.

I'D BE LIKE:YOU'VE BEEN--

WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING?

GET UP,YOU LITTLE PUSSY, GET UP.

GO GET YOUR SISTER,I DON'T CARE, COME ON.

( laughter and applause )

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