Let's move nowto Washington, D.C.,
-something Melania Trumpwill never do. -(laughter)
You know,since Trump's inauguration,
here at The Daily Show, we've been playing this game.
It's called"Who's the Real President?"
We sit around in the office,and we try and figure out
who's really runningthe country,
because you knowit's not Trump, right?
We know it's not Trump, andlike... I figured, I was like...
Let me show youthe current standings
-of what we have here,all right? -(laughter)
So... so, as you can see,for week three,
we have a whole bunch of people.
Donald Trump's still stuckin number five spot,
uh, but there's been...there's been a lot of movement
in the top three,and that's what
we're gonna sharewith you today. A few move...
At number three, we have...
Which is basicallyour celebrity couple name
for Jared Kushner and Ivanka,right?
It's also the nameof an Ikea chair.
-A lot of peopledon't know that. -(laughter)
In the number two spot,we have...
-Oh, Fox News. Yes, yes. Yes.-(laughter)
-Or as Trump calls it,his daily briefings. -(laughter)
But the number one spotin this week's edition
of "Who's the Real President"goes to...
-(audience yelling suggestions)-(drum roll)
(applause and cheering)
Yay! Steve Bannon!
Donald Trump's chief strategist,
who is also the radicalformer editor of Breitbart,
and the subject ofthe bestselling autobiography,
If Eczema Were a Human:
-(laughter) -The Steve Bannon Story.
And, guys,can I be honest with you?
This tally wasn't even close.
Because in the past week,we've learned so much
about the power and influencethat Bannon has
in the White House.
Where is he getting his ideas?
Where did the term "Muslim ban"come from?
How did the president decidethe seven countries...
NEWSWOMAN: Bannon played a key role in crafting
President Trump's extreme vetting order,
that temporary ban on immigrants
from seven predominantly Muslim countries.
Wow. Oh,can we just take a second?
-What's going on in this photo?-(laughter)
It looks like Trump isa little girl learning to dance
by standingon her father's feet.
Like, what is...? I bet Melanialooks at that picture and goes,
"I remember when you used tolook at me like that, Donald."
But yes, yes,even though the Muslim ban
has Trump's name on it,once again it turns out
he didn't really build ithimself.
It was Bannon's baby.
Which shouldn't surprise anyone.
It's in his name, people.
Open your eyes, people!
The clues are everywhere!
-(cheering, applause)-The whole name is a clue!
Ban-non. Ban-on Muslims!
What about his name Steve?
You can't pell...spell Steve without Eve.
Adam and Eve.
The Garden of Eden.
Steve Bannon isgonna order takeout tonight.
-We have to stop him.-(laughter)
Maybe I got carried away.
But still, Ban-on. Ban-on.
Anyway... not only was Bannonbehind the Muslim ban,
he's reportedly the personwho told Immigration
to ban visa and green cardholders as well.
Which, aside from beinglegally dubious,
is just a huge dick move.
You realize some of these people
have lived in Americafor decades.
This is their home.
Imagine leaving your hometo visit your family,
and then when you get back,Steve Bannon won't let you in.
And you're there like,"But I live here!"
And Bannon's like,"Well, I say you don't.
-Also, I clogged your toilets."-(laughter)
But, you see,making immigration policy
wasn't enough powerfor Steve Bannon,
so he went ahead and gavehimself more power on the DL.
White House chief strategist,Steve Bannon,
has been given a security clearance
usually held by generals,
as the result of an executive order
signed by President Trump...
NEWSMAN: According to the Times, President Trump did not know
the contents of one of the executive orders
he was signing-- he didn't know that he was
putting Steve Bannon, giving him a permanent seat
on the National Security Council.
-(audience groans)-How is this real life?
This is insane.The president didn't know
what was in an executive order?
And also-- this is crazy--Bannon slipped himself
onto the National SecurityCouncil.
He basically did it likea kid sneaks a candy bar
into his mom's shopping cart.Just, like, you know?
That's why everyone recognizes
that Steve Bannon is the realpower behind the throne here.
Everyone realizes it,even the dishonest media.
President Trump's chiefstrategist appears on the cover
of this week's Time magazineaccompanied by the title,
"The Great Manipulator."
Oh. That's a... sort ofa bittersweet milestone
for Steve Bannon--I mean, on the one hand
he's on the coverof Time magazine.
On the other hand, he'son the cover with this photo.
-(laughter)-I mean, like, the face,
what's going on with the...like, the sk...
like, I mean, that's,like, a professional...
I'm not... it's just like theman looks like a satellite image
of a storm on Jupiter,like, it just...
By the way, what kindof shadowy manipulator
goes on the cover of a magazineto announce
that he's a shadowy manipulator?
Kind of blowing up your spot,isn't it? Yeah?
It's kind of likethe Wizard of Oz posing
on a cover with the headline,"It's just some dude."
-(laughter)-Why would you do that?
Ego. Seriously,everyone is trying to figure out
whether Bannon or Trumpis in charge.
Look at this Time magazine cover.
Again, it's just,it's astounding
that this soon into a new administration...
I don't know. I-I mean, maybe Bannon's calling all the shots.
Now, if that wasn't true,
then a certain cable news fanwouldn't have felt the need
less than an hour laterto tweet...
"Largely basedon an accumulation of data"?
Come on, man.
Trump and datahave less of a relationship
than Trump and Tiffany.Come on.
-(audience groaning)-What are you, like... Come on.
But Trump's defensivenessis telling.
It shows that even he realizes
he needs to provehe's in control.
And maybe someday he will be.
But for now,let's congratulate Steve Bannon.
As of this moment, you are the real president.
The American peopledidn't elect you,
but then again, they kind ofdidn't elect Trump, either.