Ezekiel Magoo Takes a Stand

Seth Green & Jamie Kennedy Season 2, Ep 29 03/23/2004 Views: 15,012

The employees at a coffee shop must defend their company's name against Ezekiel's outrage. (3:25)

( phone ringing )

>> Thank you for calling the

Biltmore Coffee Plantation.

This is Tracy.

>> Yes, this is Ezekiel Magoo.

I am minister and head of the

Realm of Mohammed, offshoot of

the Nation of Islam.

And I am calling to complain to

you, sir, about the outrage that

you have set against the Black


Now I want to speak to a manager

because I am outraged.

>> Well, well, sir, you want to

talk to a manager...

>> Yes, I do want to talk to


I want to talk to the person

that is in charge of this place!

>> You're talking to the manager

right now.

>> Coffee Plantation!

>> Now if you would just not be

emotional and give me...

>> I have 400 years of emotion

on my back and so don't tell me

not to be emotional!

>> Sir?

>> The name of your restaurant

is offensive-- "Plantation."

Do I expect to come into your

coffee shop and be whipped on my


>> Why are you yelling at me

about the name?

>> Why don't you call it "Coffee

Concentration Camp"?

How about that?

No, because the Jews... the Jews

would be angry, wouldn't they?

If your coffee were not as

fantastic, I would never come

there, but it is good.

Now, are you okay with this


>> I'm not the person that you

are having an offensive problem


The phone number to the


>> Uh-huh.

>> ...is ( touch tones )


>> ( mimicking ): 0-7-3-8.

>> Yes.

I-I've got-I've got a restaurant

to run.

>> Look, let's just calm down.

You're a little hostile now.

You're going a little crazy.

>> Well, no, 'cause you started


>> Just calm down, just calm


>> You started with "the anger

of 400 years."

>> Yes, but...

>> So I've got to go. Bye.

( phone disconnects )

( phone ringing )

>> Coffee Plantation.

>> Yes, is this the home office

for Coffee Plantation?

>> Yes, it is.

>> Now I called to complain

about the name of your company.

>> But there's nothing wrong

with the name, sir.

>> What do you mean, there's

nothing wrong with it?

Do you know what took place on


>> Yes.

>> People picked cotton.

>> But do you know that there

still are plantations for coffee

right now in different parts of

the world?

>> What?

>> And do you know what goes on

in those places?

>> You lying.

>> People get paid to work.

>> Are they beaten?

>> No.

>> Even sometimes?

>> Nope.

I'm from Africa.

>> I'm African-American.

>> Okay, I'm African-African.

>> So you're just okay with the

plantation thing?

>> We want to portray the people

working in the plantations

having fun, that's our idea.

>> Now, see, let me say this,

maybe 'cause you African, you

don't understand the history of

slavery, because you was over

there celebrating and having a

good time, 'cause you was fast

enough to get away from the

White slave catchers, but we

over here, we got caught and we

had to work on plantations that

wasn't so happy.

I mean, you know, maybe

sometimes it was happy, like a

wedding, but most of the time,

it was bad.

>> I'm telling you is, the

Coffee Plantation name is, it's

not Cotton Plantation or Slavery

Plantation, it's all about...

>> Okay, but look, how about

renaming it The Coffee Serving


>> ( chuckles ): Oh, that's not

a good name, sir.

>> Wait a minute, wait a minute.

Do you serve coffee?

>> Yes.

>> And is it a place?

>> Yes.

>> Thank you.

>> Sir, this name has been here

for 14 years.

We're not going to change the


>> You need to have some kind of

disclaimer then up there.

You need to put on the sign,

"Coffee Plantation" and then

maybe in parenthesis, "Not the

nigga-beating kind."

What's your name?

( steam hissing )

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