Richard Lewis - Crazy Ex-Girlfriend

Larry Miller & Jeff Joseph Season 1, Ep 0107 02/24/1992 Views: 2,188

Richard dated a crazy actress. (2:05)

HOW DID I KNOW THAT?

BECAUSE I LIED.

I DIDN'T KNOW.

YOU SEEM HOT.

NOT YOU, BABE.

I MEAN, I'M... AGAIN

NOT THAT I'M... DOES IT MATTER,BUT YOU KNOW.

ARE YOU MARRIED?I'M JUST CURIOUS.

YOU GUYS MARRIED?

NO RING?

NO RING, TABLE TWO.

NO RING.

WHO AM I TALKING?

FORGET ABOUT RINGS.

I WANT TO GET MARRIED.

MY LAST-- I JUST BROKE UPWITH AN ACTRESS WHO...

LOOK, I'M NOT... OBVIOUSLY...

I DON'T KNOW IF YOU KNOW ME OR NOT

BUT I'M NO GIFT, OKAY?

BUT THIS WOMAN LIVED

IN A PREDOMINANTLY ANXIOUSSECTION OF TOWN.

THERE'S NO DOUBT-- IN MY LIFE...

SHE WAS LIKE...ACTRESSES, IT'S THE HARDEST.

LOOK, THERE'S A RECESSION.

EVERYBODY HAS IT TOUGH NOW,BUT ACTORS, IT'S TOUGH

BUT NEVERTHELESS,SHE WAS WACKO, OKAY?

SHE WAS AN ONLY CHILD, BUT SHESTILL HAD A SIBLING RIVALRY

WHICH I FELT WAS LIKE, YOU KNOW.

IN HER BACKYARD,SHE HAD A SET OF MOOD SWINGS.

ISN'T THAT A DEAD GIVEAWAY?

AND SHE'S A HOST--

ACTORS USUALLY HAVETO BE WAITERS OR WAITRESSES

DURING THE DAY.

SHE WAS A HOSTESS.

SO WE'D GO TO,LIKE, A RESTAURANT.

SHE'D GO, "TABLE FOR ME,TABLE FOR ME"

WHICH WAS SORT OF SAD.

AND THEN WE'D HAVE PARTIES.

SHE ACTUALLY WENTTO ONE OF THESE LIKE--

I THINK IT WAS CALLED PIPS--THESE XEROX JOINTS.

THEY'RE GOOD.

SHE MADE-- IT COST ME--

I GLADLY PAID 100 BUCKS FORTHE INVITATIONS FOR A PARTY

"COME BE BITTERFROM 8:00 TO 11:00"

WHICH WAS SORT OF SAD.

BUT YOU KNOW, THAT'S WHATLIFE IS ALL ABOUT, YOU KNOW.

IN FACT, SHE JUST WENTTO NEW YORK

AND I HAD TO PICK HER UPLAST NIGHT AT L.A.X.

WE'RE SHOOTING HERE IN L.A.

SHE'S A LITTLE WACKY.

I MEAN, I'M NOT...

AGAIN, MULTI-PERSONALITIES,I'M NOT KNOCKING IT.

I KNOW IT'S NOT A GOOD THING

BUT SHE ANSWEREDEVERY PAGE AT THE AIRPORT.

IT WAS LIKE,"CALL FOR DR. PHIL GARMIN."

AND SHE WENT, "THAT MIGHTBE ME, THAT MIGHT BE ME."

SO THAT WASA LITTLE EMBARRASSING.

BUT KNOW WHAT'SNOT EMBARRASSING?