Kids are awful.
My friends, Steve and Tracy,have this kid
and he's, like, 2 or 0 or 7or something.
I don't know.He's undeveloped.
And we were all at a Super Bowlparty at their house,
and this kid tried some foodhe didn't like.
He's, like, 3 years old, andwhen they try food at that age
and they don't like it,they don't handle it very well.
It's not like you or me.
If you or me, like,tried some food, I'd be like,
"Hmm, wait.Is that cheesecake?
"It is, right?Yeah, I don't like cheesecake.
"Yeah, I know.
"I know. I know.And I'm a sweets guy.
"So you'd totally thinkI like cheesecake.
"I totally get whereyou're coming from.
"But nonetheless,I don't like cheesecake,
so you can polish that offif you like."
At 3, it's not that pleasantan experience.
At 3, they just start, like,convulsing.
Their body's rejectingthis outside pathogen.
"Aah, aah, aah,
"I don't like it.I don't like it!
"Ugh, Mom. Mom! Mom!
"Mom, I don't like it!Aah!
And I don't blame 'em.
At 3 years old, you've had,like, 8 real meals
in your whole life.
It was breast milkfor 2 1/2 years
and then you start with food,and the first six meals
were (bleep) good.
And this last one is,"Oh, this is disgusting!"
Like, he just learnedthat food could be bad.
His understanding of the worldhas been lessened
by what's currentlyin his mouth, you know?
He's got nothingto compare it to.
Me, it's like, "Cheesecake, I'vehad it before. Don't like it."
Him, it's like,oh, hatred exists.